the oklahoma sky.

I've been thinking a lot recently...about what a home is, about what matters at the end of the day, and about what's worth fighting for. About attitudes and viewpoints and people.

Friends matter.
Memories matter.
Love and strength and knowing who you are most certainly matter.
Your soul, what's in it, what it should be and who should see it--they matter too.

and of course there are less grandiose things that matter. like food and clothing and shelter, and laughter, and sunlight and warmth. having a sense of belonging, having a place or thing or idea to call your own.but it's you that matters the most. you being you. the real you.

and I've noticed too that there's something about Oklahomans that matters--it's a theme with many of the people I know who've moved away--it's the oklahoma sky. With its brilliance and its harshness and its welcoming clouds. And part of it, too, is the power of the horizon. The REAL horizon. Where the sky meets the land, without forests of trees or high-rises or subdivisions to impede it. And I know too why the horizon on the ocean isn't so impressive to me--it's because people don't build on the ocean. They don't permanently establish buildings there, not ones where the sky meets the water, anyhow. So it's not so significant that someone hasn't built upon that place.
In North Carolina all I see are trees. They freaked me out when I got here. And though I now really enjoy driving through them, I also miss my open spaces. And the Oklahoma sky. Here I'm only tempted to photograph the sky as a backdrop, or as a beautiful sunrise or sunset. But in Oklahoma, I wanted to capture it just as it was, just for being there.

And today, I miss it.

hal-lo-ween, hal-lo-ween, then we'll be ready for hal-lo-ween

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

I notice that this morning, as I dressed in orange and white and black, I was singing a song. That I learned in ELEMENTARY SCHOOL! I had no idea that Mrs. Torres' songs would stick with me like this.

Do any of you Eliot-ers remember this one?

Have you seen the ghost of john?
Long white bones and the rest all gone,
Ooh, ooh, wouldn't it be chilly with no skin on?

Eliot's school song is also the only one I'm sure I remember. I know some of the cheers from high school (hail, hail to edison), but that's it. So STRANGE! I think I MIGHT know TU's, but there's no guarantee. Hmm.

Anyhoo. ENJOY HALLOWEEN!

michiganders.

it occurs to me that I know exactly four guys from michigan who live in the triangle area of NC. and all four of them are attractive. coincidence, no?

oooh....so when they said "alcohol may intensify this effect"

what they actually meant was...

if you have an appreciable amount of alcohol--no, if you even think about alco--even think about thinking about alcohol, even the amount in a non-alcoholic beer, this medicine will knock you on your ass for ten to twelve hours. this can be avoided by ensuring that no substances containing alcohol come within three miles of you at least four hours prior to taking this medicine.

Should you heed this warning, you will wake up feeling peachy with a side of keen. Should you not, you will feel miserable all day.

PS-Oh, and even being in the general vicinity of someone who has had alcohol in the past three days may intensify this effect. You know what? Just stay away from the substance completely--avoid places that sell it, people who have had it, even isopropanol could maybe have a little ethanol in it, so don't get near that either.

yikes.

good to know though. when they say that alcohol will intensify the effect of muscle relaxers, they mean business.

but now I hold my head up high...

I've got all my life to live.
I've got all my love to give.

this weekend I did some things I've never done before--but don't worry, all of them were legal. :)
drama-rama on friday. luckily it's resolved. I had lots of fun with Betsy, Michael, Terry Goss and his friend Tan. And I met a cute guy, who may or may not be buying me dinner this week. But I'm pretty sure he will...we went out to celebrate Betsy's finishing the PE. She's the best, that Betsy. Everyone should have friends like Betsy. and Terry.

I drank beer, played pool, talked on the phone in the rain and requested that the band play Pearl Jam. They teased me--playing the beginning of TWO different PJ songs and then breaking into something else. Two songs later they did play PJ for me though, and on my way out at (yikes!) 230 I thanked them for playing it. And their guitarist yelled "thanks for being hot!" Who gets thanked for that?!? People should totally say that more often!

these are the kind of bad decisions made at 2am. see above picture.

Saturday I slept and slept and slept. For my jaw issues my doctor gave me muscle relaxers, and they made me pretty much worthless for all of Saturday. But I managed to get my act together, and Betsy and I were the Wicked Witch of the West (Coast) and Wicked Witch of the East (Coast).
foggy pic, but cute, no? On the way to party #1 we very much enjoyed the cd of covers that my friend Christina sent me this month, especially Cake's "I Will Survive." We listened to it twice in the car, and then they happened to play it at the party, too! YAY!

Oh, and new drink? apple pie shooter. Apple Cider + Vodka + Whipped Cream + Cinnamon. Yum! And the most fun part? Well, you sit in a chair with 3-4 people around you...and they lean you back in the chair, and you open your mouth while they pour in the ingredients. And when they're done and they lean you forward, you shake your head to mix it up, and swallow. Messy, but delish!
and, uh...I kinda hit someone's head against the wall while doing this--because, as I mentioned beforehand, someone else prolly should have been doing the chair-leaning...

And let me tell you, there were some kick-ass costumes at this party--a cap'n crunch, a washing machine, a franzia wine box complete w/ wine dispenser, a pirate, a bearded clam, a girl doing the walk of shame, Stuart, the Scarecrow, Fred Flinstone, Charlie Chaplin and my personal fave, a guy dressed as a Hooters girl! HILARIOUS!

So, after the costume judging and the pumpkin-carving judging, we resumed playing an odd version of beer pong (with water in the cups and you just take one drink of your own bev instead of downing the cup) and dancing/karaoke. And I chatted with another hot guy, who I think will also be buying me dinner this week. :)

and we had so much fun at party #1 that we never made it to party #2, oopsie...

I am sooooo not wanting any kind of deep relationship right now, but I think it will be fun to let good-looking guys buy me food, don't you? I've never "just dated" anyone. Hell, I've never even just gone out on a date with someone new--they've always been my friend first. So I think I'm going to try this very non-commital route for the time being (especially since I'll be moving in nine months anyway)--and it's not like I'm taking advantage of 'em, because a date isn't a promise of relationship, but I'm also not entirely ruling out anything else--it's not like I'll have a one-date rule.

But also there's no point in turning down dates, right? :) well, I mean unless they're not date-able, but that's an entire other subject. and also, duh.

anyhoo.
my shoes got glitter EVERYWHERE, by the way. but they were cute, and a good use of some old heels that were about to be put to pasture. my mom was sad that I didn't add bows, and a lot of people didn't get my costume (or wanted to know why I wasn't wearing a house, too). One even accused me of being a "naughty witch," but that doesn't have much credibility coming from a guy dressed as a hooters girl. :)

But now I'm saving all my lovin'
For someone who's lovin' me

how freaking weird.

so, wednesday night I had a dream that there was broken glass all over my bedside table and my bed and me. it wasn't hurting me or gobi or hazel who were on the bed, but it had left scratches on the table.

and last night I had a dream that I was stuck in traffic (one of those big long highways with lots of open land around it that you see in movies) and I was coming up on an intersection. oh, yeah, and I was riding an elephant. a young girl elephant, to be precise.

and so I looked them up on dreammoods, and man it's so strange.

wednesday: sums up to that I'm wanting security and restoration of my mind, and I'm looking for domestic bliss and peace (my bed), I'm feeling anxious about having to start something over from scratch (the scratch), and that there's a change in my life (the broken glass).

last night's: sums up to my being frustrated at my situation in life, how smoothly things aren't going, and that I feel stuck (traffic), that I'm in control of my unconscious and aspects that I was once afraid of (the elephant, which is also a symbol of power, strength and intellect) and that I'm coming up on a decision or choice in my life (intersection).

this is so so weird. because it's SO on the money.

anyhoo. look up your dreams, they could tell you a lot about what's going on in your noggin.

oh, that's not your foot, that's broccoli!

my very kind friend Collin took me to dinner at the Olive Garden last night. It might not be authentic, and it might not be good for you, but it's still yummy. Plus, it was to celebrate our birthdays--his is on Sunday.

and I had a little adventure on my way into the restaurant.

I'm talking to my mom on the phone, trying to tell her that I need to get off the phone and go inside. I walk towards the door, realize there's a crowd of people there and the "atmosphere-providing" music is blaring, and turn around to walk away from the noise, as I'm still on the phone. I finish talking, say goodbye and turn around again to go inside.

This is when I notice the eye staring at me. Roughly twelve pairs of them. In a bit of a circle. All looking at me.

Mentally taking note of what I'm wearing and how hot I don't look (death cab for cutie tshirt, gray puffy vest, jeans, converse, long-day-at-work hair), I continue towards the door, and I swear to god they all watched me the whole way like one of those paintings where the subjects eyes follow you. I get to the door, open it, turn around and look at them, and...

so what did I do?

I waved. And said, "Hi there." because, well, I wasn't just going to let them stare and not say something.

and one of the guys says "we're not gay." And I laugh.

"um, okay..." I say. "That's great?"

"No, really. I mean, some of us are gay, but most of us aren't." (laughter from his friends)

"That's good?...well, enjoy your dinn-"

"-no, seriously." he said.

"Okay, then, which ones of you are gay?" A few of them point at two guys who look angry/annoyed/shocked, presumably because they weren't gay. "um, okay, right, then..." I say. "Gay in the happy sense, got it. Enjoy your dinner!"they laugh. I go inside.

it was amusing. maybe you had to be there.

When I told Collin this story, before I could even tell about the "we're not all gay" part of the story, his first question was, "were they gay?" Which is a reasonable question that just made me laugh even harder.

And, y'know what? I never thought they might be gay. I just thought they were probably a group of frat guys eating dinner for initiation or something. shows what being in a sorority will do to you--make you jump to a different type of conclusion.

at least they were all cute. youngins, but cute.
Oh, and the broccoli? Yeah, totally though I'd stepped on Collin's foot in the process of moving mine--but nope, turned out to just be a big piece of broccoli that was lying on the floor under the table. ew.
ps-this is from toothpaste for dinner. found at toothpastefordinner.com --it's hilarious!

i hate thursday.

not all thursdays. just this one.

when I got up my right side of my jaw hurt a LOT. all achey. like someone had punched it (and it wasn't terry goss). and I felt dizzy, as though I were drunk or hung over. I did have two glasses of wine last night, but seriously. Not drunk/hung over.

ibuprofen made some of the jaw ache go away, but I'm still mildly dizzy. I hope this goes away soon. At least I'm only a little dizzy and not afraid-to-drive dizzy.

and ooooooh! I. Am. So. Mad.

At work, his guy, M, was jsut really rude to me. He works in our shop, has been at the company forever and thinks pretty highly of himself. He's a busy man right now, what with our office and lab move and all. Anyhoo, I needed to ask him a question, and it was pressing, and M was in a conversation in my new lab. I waited for 3-4 minutes, standing there waiting patiently for him to reach the end of a thought or pause or take a breath so I could say "excuse me." AND HE ACTUALLY SAID, mid-sentence, "we're having a CONVERSATION here." I looked at him like a codfish, in the Mary Poppins meaning of the word. I heard the other two guys in the room--the chemical guys for whom I was asking this question--kind of mumble about what had just happened.

when he finally stopped another three minutes later, he said, "now (pause) WHAT (pause) do YOU(pause) need." a statement, not a question. He might as well have tossed his head all around and snapped his fingers. I soooo almost lost my composure.

I said, "I jsut need to ask a quick question, excuse me for interrupting, and M that was kinda rude." He interrupted-- "Well seems to me it was the other way around." And I said "Whatever. Anyway, are the tables put together enough so that I can put something on the bottom shelf as storage?" He said "no, they aren't" and started explaining why. I said "thanks." Took a whopping twenty seconds.

ass.

I mean, I know it isn't nice to interrupt, but sometimes it's necessary. I'm not going to stand there for twenty minutes while he practically yells at someone.

yuck-o.

so, also, I need your help with a halloween costume (ps, Jackie yours is fun!). I was going to wear my Alice costume and Otto was going to be the Mad Hatter, but as I'm sure you gleaned, that ain't happening. I think I'm going to a party at my photographer-friend's studio, and I need a costume. I was thinking maybe a super hero? Something 1) identifiable (no black canary, sterling), 2) not too modest or too skanky and 3) that I could just go buy from the store.

suggestions? I saw some cute ones on amazon, like this. And I can't just wear what I wore last year because I was 1/2 of the spartan cheerleaders. I want cute but not slutty, especially since I'm going to this party by myself...

hmm.
I could go get those cowgirl boots I've been wanting and wear 'em with a denim skirt?
be an 80s girl?
a witch?
hmm.

also, a notice. Nov 1 I'm changing my photo prices, 'cause, well, they're worth more and if I really want to sell them in a gallery then they can't be as inexpensive as they are now. so get 'em while they're cheaper...and again thanks for supporting me!

I'm looking forward to today being over. no more rude people or cubicles or bleh.

king's hawaiian bread

I went over to my friend Katie's house last night (hope you're feeling better!), and happened to mention to her that I was going to the grocery store to get some things, including some hawaiian bread. She had NO idea what I was talking about, which means that 1) she was missing out and 2) some of you might not know either! Sooo....

please please please tell me that this looks at least vaguely familiar to you…because it is so So SOOO yummy. If you've never had it, go to the grocery store ASAP and pick some up. It's in the deli/bakery area, and if you're lucky there's a couple of options for you--the circular tins (like above), a four pack of rolls and a twelve pack of rolls. Go for the tin, it's worth every penny!

I've had it hundreds of times, but my favorite way to have it is with a piping hot bowl of this.


i dip the bread in the soup-mmmmmm....seriously, try it. you might like it.

and even if you don't like the soup I guarantee you'll like the bread! happy eating!

it feels so good when he sticks it in my ear.

That’s what my best good friend Ariel has to say about an otoscope.

VERY funny at dinner. Even more amusing when taken completely out of context. Those people at Waraji must have thought we were bonkers. And Michael? He totally knows how to take a joke far far too far. But of course we all joined in.

And, I learned some new things during this convo. 1. Ariel hates earwax. 2. no one else really cares for it either. 3. Michael likes to clean out both of his ears with qtips at the same time! Weirdo.

SO, anyhoo, my birthday day was SPECTACULAR!!!

I got flowers from my two best friends. And it was so neat--it just so happened that the florist put three yellow roses and three white daisies in the arrangement--esp. cool since there's three of us, the yellow roses mean friendship and white daisies are our favorite. :)

I got the supercool picture I bought in the mail. (ps, totally go check out her art it’s incredible!) can't wait to hang it up!

And then I got sushi and presents! My friends are the awesomest. Thanks for making a potentially sucky birthday not suck at all! Thanks for the cupcakes and the phone messages and the flowers and the presents and the cards and the sushi and the FUN. And I know there’s more birthday things arriving in the mail soonish. Yippee!

Also, this is good lipgloss. technically lip jelly--more like lipgloss in chapstick form. yum!

And I’m so buying this shirt, which I found because I checked out the other flavors of lipgloss one because I liked that one so much already. isn't it cute?

ooh, and? tonight is LOST. and it's wednesday so that means art day! which I may just have to celebrate today. I've had a painting stuck in my head, and I want to get going. But only if I'm a good girl and watch my lecture first!

also, it's really weird that all of the constant parts of my daily life are in flux--my office is new, my lab is moving, and I'm moving around my bedroom, too. that's an awful lot of changes all at once!

and a clarification about the number 26--it's the only number that is sandwiched exactly between a square and a cube (5 squared is 25, 3 cubed is 27). make more sense now?

rude awakening

so, what gives?

today I have a new office in a new building and I'm packing up to move to the new lab.  I'm in the process of relocating my belongings in my home as well--moving them all upstairs!

and then, despite all of these changes in my daily routine I am still further hassled...by waking up to the beeping of my smoke detector--not going off, but because the battery died.  gah!

twenty six.

is the ONLY number that is between a square and a cube.

word on the street is that there's not another like it. and this pleases me immensely!

oh, and ps? one should not have to move oodles of gas cylinders on one's birthday. there should be a law or something.

and pps--I told my mom about this last night, and she laughed, and told me she liked that I was going to go from being a square to being a cube this year. and about how I was adding a dimension. seemed funnier at the time...

a quote for my birthday

courtesy of my mary engelbreit calendar....

One good wish changes nothing.
One good decision changes everything.
-anonymous

I like it.
Fun weekend! My friends are super-terrific! I'll post more pictures soon--like when I'm not trying to get my office and lab ready to move. But here are the BEAUTIFUL flowers that Sterling sent me on Friday.

What an EXCELLENT way to start my birthday weekend.

And then everyone came to g-loft and george's garage. The service at g-loft was crummy but they gave us a bottle of champagne. I think this pic turned out pretty well.

and here's deb, audrey, ariel and me on the couch--I think we were laughing 'cause Dmitri was such a good photographer...

and here's me getting terry back for the punch in the jaw... ;) He claims I got a punch instead of a spanking. hmmm....

ALSO, exciting news! My bff Jessica is ENGAGED!!! Yippee!

happy Kappa Delta Founders' Day and National Mole Day, peeps. and happy bday to me! thanks for all the well-wishes!

cashiers

pronounced cash-ers. it's in western north carolina, and it's beautiful!

first of all, I'd like to tell you that I WAS ON TIME. As you likely know, this is quite uncommon for me. I'm perpetually late. It's a thing. I can't help it. I am only on time if it's REALLY REALLY REALLY important. Which it was. And I was!

see, on thursday night I got a very yucky headache, and it was making me dizzy. thus, driving to ariel's home and sleeping didn't seem like a brillant plan anymore. so I woke up crazy early and drove to her house to get her. and I was there on time.

ariel and I had a ridiculous amount of fun going there--an adventure of spilling sun-dried tomato pesto in my lap while driving, wrong turns, scary drivers, pink skull headscarves, sonic and gabbing. lots and lots of gabbing. we tried to be good and study some, but it didn't work out as well as we'd hoped. we did, however, develop a team name. GO TEAM CARRIELL! we had a lot of fun decorating the place once we finally arrive. it's amazing what you can do with some wrapping paper and ribbon!

friday night we went out to dinner, and something happened that made me FURIOUS. I'm sitting at dinner, talking to this other girl Mandy, and a guy pulls a chair up to our table. This has been happening all night, no biggie. Well, at some point I leaned over to get something out of my purse, and apparently my jeans were sitting a little low. And not only did this guy have the nerve to point it out, he actually stuck out his finger and poked my ass!!! Let me tell you, I do wish I'd actually slapped him in the face. I did slap his hand and chew him out, and he left after that (and after telling me to grow up, which is ridiculous, because he's the one hitting on girls twelve-fifteen years younger than him). other than this incident, we had a most excellent time at dinner--it was scrumptious and the wine was delish! and this little girl danced for us, and we sang happy birthday to "pop" the man at the table next to us with his children and grandchildren. good times.


saturday, tho. saturday was brutal, at least in the am. my tummy wasn't feeling so happy when I woke up (and likely I was just exhausted--from the um, lessee, 4 plus...carry the one...oh yeah, like 14 hours of sleep I'd gotten in the past three nights) but I took some pepto and off we went...to CLIMB. A. FRIGGIN. MOUNTAIN. And by climb, I mean run up at a blindingly speedy pace. About 2/3 of the way up I couldn't handle just stopping for a minute. I needed to sit and rest, or I was going to spew. And there was no Garth to say, "if you're gonna spew, spew into this." So, thank goodness the brilliant Ariel sent the rest of the crowd on their merry way and we sat down and took it slowly. Amazingly we made it to the top, despite having to go up a few sections like this:
that, my friends, is a rock face. it might look lame here, but it was a bit more intense in person, and even worse with an ailing tummy. but getting to the top was soooo worth it. see?

next, after our not-as-miserable, but-still-hard-on-the-knees trek down, we went and had pizza! and walked around in highlands! and saw bridal veil falls!

and came home. because we were tired.and saturday evening was a superb combo of cranium, spring rolls, wine and lingerie. so. much. fun. sunday am we had a quick breakfast, snapped a quick pic and were on our way.

we stopped at the thorpe reservoir

and chugged along--and to make the weekend complete, we listened to "if i was a rich girl," the indigo girls and had olive garden for lunch on the way home. and we got home early-ish. up until this time on sunday, it was a good weekend indeed!

i heart myspace.

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a multi dimensional wonderland, with many layers. You're the type that always has multiple streams of though going. And you can keep these thoughts going at any time. You're very likely to be engaged in deep thought - and deep conversation.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

I mean, it's full of all sorts of stuff and people and thoughts from all over the place. And it has quizzes like this. silly, perhaps. but that doesn't mean I don't seriously dig myspace.

as a potential renter, would you rather...

see rent listed as a lump sum or as an amount plus half of utilities?

whoa.

last night I dreamed about my face peeling. like, you know how sometimes you get those sunburns and huge sheets of skin peel off? Or, you know those clear face masks that peel off in sheets? It was like that.

it's the first dream I've remembered in a while.

and whoa.

from dreammoods...

Face

To see your own face in your dream, denotes the persona you choose to show to the world as oppose to the real you. It may refer to confrontations and your willingness to deal with problems and issues in your life.

To dream that you face is flawed or pimply, represents erupting emotions. You may have suffered an attack on your persona or your reputation.

Peel

To dream that you are peeling something, represents the shedding away of old ways, habits and conditions. It may also mean that you are finally getting rid of and discarding unneeded exterior pretenses.

um, odd. definitely odd, considering.

On another topic--anyone ever been to albuquerque before? Jessica, Renee and I are thinking about going there for our ten year friendiversary. Guess we need to get each other presents of tin/aluminum or diamond jewelry. :)

tired of being a statistic.

I mean, we're always going to fall under some type of a statistic, right? I understand that. But seriously?!? Tired.

I'm already 25 and divorced. (And for your high-horse, up-on-a-pedestal, you-gave-up-too-soon people, you cannot be further from the truth. I hate it when people label others pathetic for getting a divorce. Sometimes that applies, but not in my case. Trust me. Anyhoo. Tirade over.) And now I fall into another statistic--'cause Otto and I are no longer a couple, as of a little while ago. been trying to find a way to type it, but it's kind of hard to see it all written out. don't like to air my dirty laundry on my blog, y'know? anyhoo.

sigh.

and yes, I'm fine, and no, I'm not going to blog all about it. If you want juicy details, there aren't any. And if you want to know the story anyway, you'll ask, and likely I'll tell. I'm not bitter about it, I'm just bitter about the judgement that some people will have about it. It pisses me off. And it's not nice to say things like, "yeah, well, it's not like we weren't expecting this to happen." Because, well, no matter how you meant them, they're hurtful.

Anyhoo. Think this is it. Prolly for the best, but it still hurts. Happier post soon, I'm sure.

tonight, I'm going to look at furniture 'cause a store that sells cute stuff is closing. I have zero idea how expensive said cute items are, so we'll see how it goes.

(RED)

have you heard about this? absolutely incredible. we should ALL participate in this.

buy a shirt? make a difference.
buy some shoes? make a difference.
buy a watch? make a difference.
use an amex? make a difference.

by doing the kind of thing you just might have been doing already.

who i am.

this weekend this song really "spoke" to me. especially the bold parts.

who i am.
-jessica andrews

If I live to be a hundred
And never see the seven wonders
That'll be alright
If I don't make it to the big leagues
If I never win a Grammy
I'm gonna be just fine
Cause I know exactly who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done my momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

So when I make a big mistake
And when I fall flat on my face
I know I'll be alright
Should my tender heart be broken
I will cry those teardrops knowing
I will be just fine
Cause nothing changes who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done my momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

I'm a saint and I'm a sinner
I'm a loser; I'm a winner
I am steady and unstable
I'm young, but I am able

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done my momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done my momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am
That’s who I am

stressed out

you know how sometimes you need a run-on sentence to describe all of the things that are the matter with your day? that's how I feel. at least it involved sushi and good music.

if only I could finish these damn excel spreadsheets so I can go out of town this weekend! yeesh!

on a happier note, I got my hair did. I like it. Might make it a little redder, just for kicks. heck, why not, right? we'll see. this pic makes it look a little more red than it actually is, but oh well.

oh, and a joke.
what are the only two things a chemical engineer can be certain of?
death and texas.

oh, what punny joy! also, watch out for sterling gates, that boy is trying to be the male version of me! well, sorta. same car, but he's got the 5 door and I have the 4 door. same wallet, but different colors. same fave band. used to have the same cell phone. and now he's buying black chuck taylors! if he dyes his hair reddish and buys a pink backpack, it's on!

and check out andrew bird. i like his stuff and his lyrics are clever.

and while smiling have spoken my name.

ten cool points if you know the name/words/something identifying about the title. hint: it's part of hymn.

'cause sunday I joined Pleasant Grove United Methodist Church. It's the first church I've joined all by myself, and up until yesterday I was a member at Trinity in Oklahoma, which, clearly, made attending difficult.

I'm really excited! It worked out nicely too, since after church they had a how-you-can-get-involved science-fair-style thing in the fellowship hall. I'd love to join the choir, but since they have two services I'm not so sure I want to--I'm not keen on being there for two services every Sunday. I did sign up for more info for that, though, and I'm also looking at joining the bell choir since they don't play as often. We'll see.

and, fun stuff? I got a PG-UMC coffee mug full of candy, a PC-UMC sticker AND a PC-UMG cookbook. I made out like a bandit. :) Some of the recipes look pretty yummy, and if they are I'll share.

and THEN I got to go to Uno's, and THEN Katie and began cutting the strips for my quilt. I think it's going to be beautiful. We both really really like the fabric. I had fun talking to her, comparing our cukes and having tea--in the british fashion. Very enjoyable. I'm looking forward to more quilt work soon! It's therapeutic!

oh, and now is as good a time as any to tell the mother teresa thing from a few weeks ago. so, I went to hear this speaker for NWFD--molly barker from girls on the run. she was talking about girls and self esteem, and how at some teen-ish ages girls start being more concerned about "fitting in" and what's "cool," and less interested in pursuing their hopes and dreams and passions and skills. and these girls deny a skill or ability or dream or idea they have-they stop raising their hand in class, stop being confident and start being self-conscious. and this program is all about not doing that. they encourage the girls to do what they can do, to excel, to dream to reach for the stars...and to realize that when you're doing what your meant to do, THEN you will be the most beautiful.

and that's when she brought up mother teresa.

it seemed to molly (and I think a lot of people would agree with her) that mother teresa did what she was *supposed* to do. and she noticed that when people saw/talked about mother teresa, no one was thinking "ew, she's old." or "my, she needs botox." or "goodness, she could lose a few pounds." No, all they saw was how beautiful she was, how wonderful and strong and true, because mother teresa was being mother teresa. she was embracing who she was, and she was using the gifts that she had been given.

it really hit me when she pointed that out--because it's so true. and what an excellent perspective.

oh my fur and whiskers!

check this out!

on saturday it took seven and a half hours and five phone calls to get our dv-r delivered. We were "supposed" to have a four-hour delivery window, and Otto got up at 8am to wait for the guy. I'm calling his supervisor today, actually. when we played imaginiff on saturday at the merritt's my annoyance at the cable guy made otto choose to describe me as "grouchy as a bear" instead of the other five options--the most popular ones were "proud as a peacock" and "sly as a fox."

here’s otto driving like a granny on the way to the merritt’s…

and while at the home of the lovely merritts and after eating some delish food (including my pumpkin pie!) ariel realized she'd forgotten to give us the bread. she offered to give some to everyone to take home. she split the loaf between audrey and me, giving audrey the half in the bag and me, well, just the bread. no bag. no saran wrap. no ziplock. no nothing. which required picture taking...

so, back the the dv-r thing--y'see, I got so annoyed at the cable fellow because, I had something to do on Saturday. I wanted to enter that picture in the state fair competition. And I did--with about nine minutes to spare. Since they wanted good NC scences I was going to enter my "a breath of fresh air at oregon inlet" photo--the one of the shell with the ocean behind it. HOWEVER, Target's one hour printing of an 8x10 is pathetic, and I had to come up with another plan quick. But I'm quite glad I did, 'cause I entered this one. And imho it looks FANTASTIC! with the white mat and the black frame. Next week Otto and I are going to the fair to see my competition--it will be judged by the end of the week. The only crummy part is that since I didn't mail it in I have to go pick it up--on my birthday--between 8am and 4pm. Which means I'll have to work late that day to make up the time, if I do end up working that day..we'll see.

anyhoo.

there's only one problem with the photo submission, though. I kind of filled out the form twice--once for the pic I submitted and once for the shell one. and I kind of got 'em mixed up and didn't realize it until I was home . which means that my current pic is submitted under the wrong name...oopsie. oh well. they aren't judging the name, right?!? can I blame that on the cable guy? hmmm...

oh, and one more exciting photo thing. on friday I had lunch with a prof at ncstate who is also a photographer. I met him in april at the pca-nc event and I went to his show last month. we talked about grad school and photography, and he told me about an organization here and a new art store for me to check out, and said that he'd introduce me to some of his gallery contacts once I put together a portfolio. when I got back to work I emailed him my website, and here's what he had to say..."SH!T. You are damn good. What are you buying my junky flower photos for??? Your site looks great too! I've changed my mind, I am NOT going to introduce you to any of my gallery contacts;)!" it totally made my day. if you want to check out his stuff, it's at gorgaphotography.com. his website is still under construction, so just click on photos and you'll see 'em. anyhoo, happy carrie.

vodka, anyone?

so, last week as I'm watering my plants, noticing how the basil is looking a little peaked and how there are about to be a bunch of ripe hot peppers and I see it! this watermelon growing in the bushes! somehow I'd never managed to notice it before--but it there, growing and nicely green! earlier this summer I was disappointed that my little tiny watermelon was a attacked by the squash bugs, who were kind enough to decimate my zucchini before moving on to my pumpkin (which I rescued) but for some reason they skipped over this guy.

now, I realize it's october. and this is a watermelon. and the two don't really mix.

unless vodka is involved...

oh and ps? word to the wise. don't use vanilla vodka to spike a watermelon. it might sound like it could be bearable--after all, how strong is that vanilla flavor, really...? strong enough. the kind of strong where you eat a bunch of said spiked watermelon in hopes of shutting down your tastebuds, and you just might end up very drunk with your friend ariel, easily coerced into finishing off the rest of that same vanilla vodka and having a very hung over fifth of july...

blah.

Watched LOST last night--How strange, strange, strange. At least now we know where the polar bear in season one comes from, potentially. I thought the beginning was a Henry Gale flashback. Tonight I’m going to the amex thing to see what that says. I'm so so annoyed that there are only six episodes before the break until Feb. Yikes!

so there's mysteries and premiere info on cnn now--on c-n-n!!!

and today was on of those mornings where I didn't want to wear anything I owned. well, that's not 100% true. what I really wanted to wear was my white tshirt. all by itself. it's a skosh thin, but certainly not too thin to wear in public unless I didn't wear a bra. however, for work, it most certainly IS too thin to wear by itself. and since a significant portion of my clothes need to be given to goodwill 'cause they're too short in length, I was left trying to find something to wear that 1) didn't reveal my midsection when I shrugged or moved, 2)could be worn with my new kicks and 3) had long or at least 3/4 sleeves 'cause it tends to be cold in my building. it wasn't a fun morning.

But I’m fully and appropriately clothed, and that’s swell. also, I'm extremely tired. I'm getting 7.5-8 hours of sleep a night--what gives?

Time for ½ price sushi lunch even though I really should be watching a lecture…

is it friday yet?

my very own pony--now I don't need one for my birthday!

this was weird last time. hopefully it works now.

our night at beefmastor--better late than never.

Create Your Own!

I think the slide show says PLENTY, other than recounting our tales of the drunk doctor who was flirting with his wife's single best friend all night, me shamelessly promoting my photos to her when she was telling us about her PR and artsy job, Otto getting drunker and drunker and drunker and the sh*t Michael got from the waiter for having gone to Clemson--they could tell because of our koozies. It was a very very good time--well, until the next day at least. Michael even cooked us breakfast!

na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na

'cause we just need a little controversy.

and that, sterling my sweet, is the eminem reference. not yours. note the spelling. thanks for the idea though. made me laugh so hard I cried.

oh, and also...hum dei la la la, la la la la la, la la la la la, la la la la

"because that's the way we roll."

-jessica a. hargrove

thank goodness for good friends. and cell phones with unlimited weekend minutes. and chai.

also, sometimes boys are idiots. that's the fact of the matter. girls are idiots sometimes too, sure, but boys take the idiot cake. with a side of idiot icecream.

eh.

anyhoo.

I'm quite pleased to say that this was an EXCELLENT weekend for shopping. And it's getting all fall-like in NC, and I'm enjoying that immensely. It's so funny how the seasons here compare to OK--we get a little hotter and a little colder in Tulsa, but the hottest and coldest seasons last longer in OK than NC, it seems to me.

Tulsa has shorter springs and falls with longer summers and winters, where NC's summers and winters only have the intense heat/cold for a month and maybe a little change.

And, I LOVE LOVE LOVE October.

because it's my birthday month.
and it's kaydee's founding month.
and it has national mole day.
and it's time for pumpkin pie.
and pumpkin bread.
and halloween.
and costumes.
and pumpkin carving.
and it might get cold enough to use my down comforter.
and I get to put mums on my doorstep.
and hot chocolate, chai and cider come into season.
and there are special beers just for this month!
and the leaves start to change.
and all sorts of cool people have birthdays this month (some cooler than others, mind you!)
and you can wear corduroy and tall boots and scarves.
and I get to go to Ikea (I think).
and it begins my travels--to the outer banks, richmond, mathews, los angeles, potentially charleston, oklahoma and potentially houston too.
and it's time for candy corn and those pumpkin candies.
and it's the right temp for hoodie sweatshirts.
and baked potato soup.

and I love love love love love October. LOVE it.

so enjoy the first Monday in October. :)

and, in other exciting news, my pumpkin that I grew is turning orange. I'm HOPING it will be ready to carve by Saturday...we shall see.

it's not a huge one--it's smaller than a basketball--but I like it.