okay, well now I'm just getting a little bit giddy...

so, potential full disclosure as appropriate--but I am starting to get some fantastic eco-friendly ideas for our wedding. like, I totally want to spill the beans, but I must talk to Matt, and I think I want to leave parts as a surprise. maybe.

and omg, I just typed the words "our wedding." did you read that? OUR WEDDING.
holy freaking smokes.

yesterday I was kind of bummed. I feel like, in math terms, fiancematt and I have too many unknowns and not enough equations to solve for them. (yeah, mathgeeky, I know.) like, we think of such-and-such brilliant plan, and start to go through our list of "musts" and go "sh!t. that won't work."

our tempers are getting shorter and our frustration getting higher.

(eg: will people come to oklahoma? or are they going to boo-hoo about money?* if they don't come, were they the type of people worth making it in north carolina? or people we can just celebrate with another time? what about our families? what about our friends? where are people coming from? what about north carolina since it's here? do we focus on what is eco-friendly or what is emotionally-friendly or what is pocket-friendly? is there a balance we're willing to live with?)

*[and by boo-hoo about money, I'm not being insensitive to the economic times or personal situations. but there's a BIG difference between not being able to afford something and complaining that a bride and groom made a choice that isn't convenient for you, personally. I feel like I have a right to say that since I attended ALL nine weddings I was invited to as a guest this year--in four different states at that. It was expensive. But I made it happen because these people were important to me. we have realized that location is going to affect many friends and loved ones and their respective pockets, and some won't be able to come. and we understand that. but we don't want anyone to feel slighted or complain about our decision!]

and yeah, this where-to-have-it thing isn't a cake-walk, but we're gonna figure it out. we HAVE decided not to get mad at each other about it, and we've decided that it'll all work out in the end. :)

and? that the very most important thing is getting MARRIED.

[because after that we get to go on a honeymoon. and not talk about whose money is whose. and eventually have babies. and enjoy lots of laughter and sunsets and frothy beverages and share our LIFE. and grow old together. and eventually I'll have the honor of pushing him around in a wheelchair. and in the meantime he'll make it up to me. etc. :)]

but right now? now I'm focusing on making decisions as they come instead of forcing the decision-making path. and it is making me GIDDY.

tell you what--since I can only give you some info? I'm gonna make an "inspiration board" and share it with you. :)