the best part of waking up…

is not folger’s in your cup. or even java dave’s. it’s having matt in his sleepy haze say “you look pretty.” this doesn’t happen every day, but when it does it makes me smile. :)

I had some supercrazy dreams last night. I haven’t had such vivid dreams recently, but last night I did. It was weird too since I actually slept rather poorly overall.

Dream #1. I had a dream that I had trouble sleeping and that I called my friend Nicole, who also has trouble sleeping, and we talked on the phone to pass the time.

Dream #2. This one was long. And kind of intense. So let’s see…

Matt and I lived in a house. We’d just bought it. It was an older townhome and in the block of homes was a hotel and down the street was a shopping center. It was HUGE. But it had this teeny kitchen. There were two doors in the kitchen, and along that wall were two refrigerators—one that was an old olive-yellowish one that was kind of skinny and a white one that was about 16” wide and four feet tall. In this one plastic had been molded to only hold glass coke bottles. They were side by side and made the tiny doorways even smaller--it was very hard to get in and out of the kitchen.

On the front balcony there was another squat fridge that also would only hold glass coke bottles.

The kitchen also had three stoves. Or two stoves and a dishwasher. It was hard to tell. And VERY crowded. You could barely walk in/out.

At night I went into the basement to find Gobi and Hazel, and heard them meowing in the distance, which was weird. But then I saw this open door, so I went inside to call them. I could see the cats’ eyes in the darkness, but I could also see stairs—lots and lots of beige carpeted stairs. It was like this used to be the bottom floor of a bunch of houses and they’d closed off access to the basement. And I had another townhome on that side of me, so I thought this was particularly odd since these were likely, amongst others, their stairs..

Then, Gobi and Hazel rushed off and I followed them, trying to pick them up and bring them back. And I got lost in this dark sea of stairs. I started to panic, and I guess they did too, and we ran and ran and ran until I saw them go through another door. We were in an area with trees and came around the back balcony of a restaurant. I had no money, no keys, no cell phone, so I asked one of the men smoking if I could get a ride home. He asked where I lived, and I told him, and it was ACROSS TOWN.

I’d just run across town?!? But he agreed to take me home. I was still carrying Gobi and Hazel in my arms. I got home and managed to get inside, and Matt calmed me down, and by then it was midday. He said we should go sit by the lake, which was on the edge of our GINORMOUS backyard. We went by the old boathouse on our property and I sat on a huge rock under an umbrella looking at the smooth, still water and the blue sky.

And then I heard a noise and looked up and saw cannonballs. Friggin’ cannonballs. At least twenty of ‘em heading our way!!! None of them hit us, but they landed all over our property, and did have to take shelter on the backside of the boathouse.

And then I woke up.

No shit.

So, of course, I looked it up. I think, well, without getting very specific, I need to get the negative/cold out of my life so that it isn’t sucking me in. And I feel very helpless and like I'm stuck. The dream says I’ve been thinking about this (and I have, a LOT) but I am not so sure how to take care of this. I mean, I’ve been through rough stuff before, but not like this. But I’m processing the changes that have to be made, and they need to be made right away (that’s actually what the cannon was—about the suddenness).

And it is SO true.

I am really not making it up. Dream interpretation requires you to take your own life into account, but it says what it says. I mean, the small kitchen, two fridges (chilling personality, cold attitudes, etc), three ovens and the dishwasher, the bottles (bottling your emotion), the open door, the basement, the stairs, the stranger, the lake, the cannonballs—it is kind of uncanny!

Anyway, I’ve got some thinking/considering to do. Some things to change. I already knew this, but it is SO WEIRD that I had dreams about things that I didn't even know were related to my situation. It is so strange. I love/hate it how dreams make me think.