Tuesday, September 12, 2006

macaroni and cheese, phone calls and revelations.

strike that, reverse it. or read the post from the bottom up, maybe?

In addition to the wedding festivities, I've had a pretty busy last few days.

It all began on Friday. Oh, Friday, how I love thee. Anyhoo. On the way to Podunkish, VA, the little puzzle pieces that make up Carrie's thought processes were assembling themselves. Logic, insight and good old-fashioned gut feelings helped form the pieces into an actual concept. And I talked to Otto about it, and I've decided something.

I am not going to paint anymore.

Okay, well that's not exactly true. I'm just not going to paint anymore unless I really, really want to.

I am an okay painter. I enjoy it, but about 1/3 of the time I don't really dig what I paint and I end up being disappointed that I spent my time doing it. Sometimes I get really excited about a certain thing I painted, and that makes me happy.

However, I think in comparison, for me,

photography skills >>> painting skills.

And, (here's logical Carrie coming into the equation) photography is cheaper (both upfront and to produce an actual photo), it produces a result more quickly, it is easier to take a picture that someone else will like than to paint one that someone else will like, it also makes me happy and if I take a picture I don't like it's not a big deal at all. So, um, I want to be Carrie, the Material Scientist / Chemical Engineer / Pretty-Darn-Good-Photographer, not /Mediocre-Painter.

I think I'm putting that on my to-do list.

Anyhoo, I decided this on Friday, and I told Otto about it—that I was thinking about mostly abandoning painting and so on. And after hesitating for a moment to make sure I was serious, he said, "Good. Because you're a damn good photographer." This made Carrie pleased.

Then all that weekend stuff happened. And while I was attempting to sleep on the way home, I got a message from my two bestest friends. They rule. THANKS. It's quite nice when your friends totally affirm a choice you've made in your life without yet being aware that you've made it. So...

We were talking about you, about your birthday, they said, which led us to talking about the pictures we saw on your blog. And, um, we think you're very amazing at that and really talented and you should do that as a job or something. Or at least a part time one and show your pictures at Mayfest and stuff because we think people would absolutely buy them. Ooh! And then you could travel the world and take pictures and we could come with you—Jessica would help us talk to people and Renee would provide the musical background—and then we could make a documentary of it! But really, you're very talented at photography and we think you should put lots of time and energy into it.

And, as Renee once said about me, if you've ever wondered why Renee and Jessica are my best friends, now you know. (cft love to the both of you)

So, that pretty much firmed up that thought, yup yup. And I could breathe a nice sigh of relief instead of wonder if I was losing my mind. Which, um, I felt like I might be doing. I LOVE painting. It's hard to decide not to pursue something you enjoy, y'know? But I feel much better about it now.

Oh, and about the macaroni? Well, Carrie the Cook RUINED BOX MACARONI.


How in the world do you do that, you might wonder--ruin box macaroni in TWO ways???…well, first of all, use Annie's 'cause it's yummy and it's better for you anyhow. And be very hungry and lazy from your travels so you just want to fix something quick and easy. And then get distracted by Season 4 Episode 2 of Gilmore Girls for just thislong. But, uh, be distracted after you've cooked and drained the noodles and after you add the cheese powder but before you add the milk and a tiny bit of butter.

And then your cheese powder will be burned on the bottom but look totally normal on top. Double bonus if you can manage to spill half of the cooked pasta on the floor instead of into the pan, and you have to fight with two cats to try to put it in the trash before they can eat it.

Now picture this in your head. Wish someone had been filming—America's Funniest Home Videos here I come!

and PS-thank you, as well, to you folks who told me which pictures you liked, or how great/fun/amazing they were. not only did you absolutely make my day(s), but you helped me realize this too. and I appreciate it. ooh! and though I've printed the photos (and I'm going to have to re-print the tree one 'cause it came out too dark) I've yet to decide which ones, exactly, are going in. but both shells and the ferris wheel are, for sure.


brookeandpaul said...

wow! okay, where to begin. you're a good, thorough blogger.

1)i agree that you should persue your photography. it's obvious that you love it and you have inspired me to buy a nicer camera. and as long as you don't mind the extra work, you could actually make some profit from it.

2)that does not mean that you have to quit painting. but i do know where you are coming from- loving something arty but not feeling good enough at it (i feel this way every damn day- so you are officially an artist). but, if you do more of it, you will improve, just like with anything. or you can do it just occasionally and that is great too- i like them you know. OR OR OR- find a way to COMBINE THE photography and the painting for certain projects- watercoloring on the prints or using transfer processes and such.

3)i do shit like that with the macaroni (particularly the spilling part) all the time. sometimes i wonder if my soul is in there laughing at me. at least someone would be entertained by my antics!

Mr. Junk said...

Aww... but I like your paintings...

Well, I can understand not wanting to do something that you don't feel confident about.

And at least you didn't burn minute rice...

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