Thursday, November 09, 2006

sixtieth

my grandparents don't read this--heck, my granny even REFUSES to use or own a computer--but I'm really amazed by them today. because it is their sixtieth wedding anniversary. their diamond anniversary. one of those few years where the "traditional" and "modern" gifts match.

sixty years is a long, long time. sixty years with three children, six grandchildren, two great grandchildren (so far!), ten or more family weddings (eight where my grandfather walked the bride down the aisle), many houses, at least four cities, a couple of churches, many bible studies, multiple surgeries and joint replacements, four dogs that I know of, and they're still going strong.

some would say it's just for show. they're OLD now. and they often don't get along. but it's sweet too because I see that there are still parts of them that love each other very much.

so this is them, from when I visited in May.

and here's what my family and I sent them (adam, you too!). well, this or something like it.



and I've been thinking recently (and as a divorced woman I think I can say this. well, you could say it if you weren't too. but I feel like maybe I have a little bit more perspective on the matter) about marriage. and what's wrong with it today. and high profile couples who split, and that 50% divorce rate, and wow. it makes me really sad. People do grow apart, or aren't who they seem, and I get that. I really get that. But it makes me sad that it is what it is. I'd say it's the pressure to marry--but when hasn't that existed? And the smugmarrieds who say divorce is lame are right, but they're wrong at the same time. (and asses for judging, but moving on...) I'm really sincerely hoping that this divorce rate goes down. And that people are taught more about what really makes two human beings compatible, and how to fight fair and how not to cheat. I wish that people as a whole were more honest, had more integrity, and placed more value on love than money.

because I think the beatles were onto something...because at the end of the day, married or single or in-between, gay or straight or bi, happy or sad or lukewarm, smart or stupid or average, black or white or red, love is all you need.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

congrats to them! we are spending our thanksgiving in alabama for my husband's grandparents' 60th anniversary. wow. that is a looooong time.

Turner said...

60 years is an amazing achievement, so congrats to them. And you are so right about marriage and the divorce-rate and the know-it-alls who think they have all the answers... every situation is different.

Here's to hoping that someday I'll hear about my granddaughter posting a future blog about me and my wife's 60th anniversary

Anonymous said...

When Todd and I moved in together, and started talking about our future life together as a married couple, I couldn't help but think "I really hope this lasts". When everything is good in a relationship, it's great.. but when it's not, it's horrible. Coming from a past (horrible) relationship where I thought I would marry that person, I started to think "What if THIS is just like the last one, its great now, but will soon turn completely sour". I know Todd is completely different from Ben, and I really think that we will make it through the hard times, but I think you really need to have an understanding of marriage before you get into it.

I think too many, especially young, couples get married these days without knowing what it's really about. I really pushed the issue of pre-marriage counseling to Todd, and we're going for our second session this sunday. I saw problems in our relationship now, and I didnt want that to carry over into our marriage, and have it end.

I know that the divorce rate is high these days, and I don't want to become another statistic. I'm not saying divorce is wrong, or that those who get divorced don't know what they're doing, but maybe if people learned more about marriage and the sanctity of it, they would think before they got married. You know?

 
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