eco-friendly review #2: getting things clean

so, my first review is of my eco-friendly laundry detergent. y'all have heard me talk about this for quite some time. between the two of us we FINALLY used up the first batch, more or less. granted, there was a time in the interim when matt and I used up other laundry detergent that he had, but most of our laundry has been done using this stuff. however...

you'll notice that none of you have walked away in terror because our clothes were stinky, and I haven't been walking around with stains on my shirts, which is good too. I'm terribly clumsy and I spill things often, so this is kind of an accomplishment!

I really like how easy it is and that it seems to clean just fine. And that I don't have to worry about any allergic reactions!

I wish it foamed up (that's all mental, though) and I sometimes get annoyed 'cause I have to kind of stir it around to make sure I get soap AND the washing soda and all. I also think I'd like it better if I could find a tablespoon to store inside of the actual container.

Next time I'm making it with some Mrs. Meyers soap I picked up on clearance, and that should give it a faint scent that I think I'll enjoy (and won't irritate my nose!). If you want to try, you can find the recipe here or here. And if you feel like being fancy, go to your local farmers market or green store and pick up some soap!

Speaking of soap...I tried some Burt's Bees Fabulously Fresh Peppermint & Rosemary soap. It smells sooooooo refreshing and it gets me clean, and I appreciate that. I also reallyreally like it that it's local--their plant is quite literally about 3 miles or less from my office. Probably a lot less. I used to try to avoid them because they offered me such crappy pay for a job (50 cents more an hour than I was making as an intern my senior year!) but that was five years ago so it hasn't mattered for a while!

The soap is good, but it got an 8 for two reasons. One is the little chunky black things in the soap. maybe they're almond seed meal? I dunno what they're for, but I don't like how sometimes the soap level will make it so they're sticking out. And the other reason is a bit more, ahem, intimate. I would keep this soap away from any sensitive areas, as it tingles, and not necessarily in a pleasant way. At times it has left, for instance, my underarms or the delicate skin inbetween my toes feeling weird, and I'd just as soon have skipped that! But overall, highly recommended and WONDERFUL to use after, say, working out because it smells so good and refreshing!

ps: there was a ladybug on my car roof today before I left home. do say hello.

a cheesy joke

I've been meaning to tell y'all this one...you need to say it aloud. or at least aloud in your head.

what is the sexiest animal combination?
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..
.

.

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brown chicken, brown cow.

also, my friend kara has totally bragged about these aprons, and now there's a giveaway for 'em. anyone can enter, so go check it out.

"if only they were recycled, then I'd be the man!"

~matt

so, yesterday we went to bogart's to celebrate a year and a half. for those of you who are not aware (or who haven't caught on yet) we celebrate our monthiversaries. Matt's parents do it, y'see. They have bigger celebrations when they got to, say, 450 or whatever. It's pretty cute I think. And I must admit I like it even more because it's Matt's idea. :)

I got him a lock-picking kit and a bottle of knob creek. He got me these.
yes, there are 18. yes, they all were signed. they said "I love you! Matt" and every time he wrote Carrie on the envelope there was a heart at the end. I was going to leave them at home today but Matt wanted me to bring them to work and I have an open shelf. :)

I liked them so much that I rated them in Janice-style. They would have gotten a ten but they weren't printed on recycled paper. :)

I'd gone to choir before dinner (and after working from 815 until 650 yesterday) and by the time we were heading home after dinner we were both tiiiiiired. full tummies and exhausted people.

I opened the bedroom windows and spent the night warm under every single bit of the covers. poor matt was chilly as I hogged them all, it was kind of sad this morning when he was saying how cold he was all night! oopsie!

so, some info for you:

exhibit A, the glasses I just ordered. I'm going to have them put in Rx lenses at my eye doctor's. You'll notice they say "eco friendly." That's cause they are made of reclaimed plastic!! I have had the same glasses for three years so I figure it's time to give myself a second option. Best of all, these puppies were WAY cheaper than getting cute frames at their office. a caveat however--not all glasses on their site are eco-friendly. look at the name and/or the note on the side. also, bamboo glasses can't have prescription lenses put in.

ever wondered why carbon monoxide is such a big deal? I mean, yeah, there are detectors and it can kill you, but can't water kill you too? so, if you don't have a CO detector and you have a need for one, here's why you should get it--when exposed to CO, your hemoglobin in your blood (the stuff that takes oxygen from the lungs to the organs) binds to the CO instead of oxygen. As a matter of fact, the hemoglobin wants to bind to CO much more than to oxygen--about TWO HUNDRED times more. This means that all that oxygen that travels around your body is now replaced by CO, and that's why things start to malfunction--vision loss and weakness and all--because your body needs the oxygen. It was alarming to realize *why* it was so bad.

ethanol from corn may be a really, really, really bad idea. okay, well maybe not three reallys, but definitely one. I think I'm going to be telling you A LOT from my paper research. y'see, when you use the corn-based ethanol for a fuel the nitrogen emissions from vehicles remain the same BUT the nitrogen emissions from fuel production go up by as much as 25%. And nitrogen is good, necessary stuff--we couldn't live without it--but in higher amounts it's scary because of what it does. In the stratosphere it will destory ozone. That's bad, of course. But closer to the ground it can actually make ozone, which leads to smog and is something you certainly don't want to breathe in. And it's in acid rain. yeah.

I mean, I 100% believe there's no one solution and that we'll have new problems no matter what we do, but some roads we're better off not pursuing at all. maybe ethanol from wood chips is better? maybe.

oh and did you hear about the chevy volt? WHY couldn't we all have this technology now? with the ten year life cycle for cars SO SO SO many of our vehicles would be ones like this, not ones like my little Mattie the Mazda. the 400 miles with a full charge and a tank of gas is a 25% increase in fuel economy overall (well, sort of. I mean, right now cars are built for that 300 miles on a tank, so SUVs have larger tanks and compacts have smaller, y'know) but 40 miles without a drop of gasoline?!? I could go from home to work to church and back home again without using any gas AT ALL! now, if only they could switch all of our power to greener sources...

and I just think this is worth the read.

welcome to our humble abode...where electronics come to die.

please leave all cell phones, ipods, cameras and anything else battery operated at the door. or bring them in at your own risk.

last night my hard drive died.
shortly after we moved in matt's computer crashed.
and and and his razr is dead and gone, too.

thank GAWD it was my computer hard drive that dies, because all of my pictures are on my portable one. I last backed that up in july, and let me tell you, I'm backing it up right now, too. but MAN. guess I shoulda sprung for the continued warranty when I sent my computer in to be fixed before because I already paid them $50 just to talk to me, and now I have to pay another $170 for a new hard drive.

Anyone in the area know a good computer person? I'd be happy to go to someone other than Dell if the price is cheaper, I just don't know where to start. I guess I could call the geek squad?

things that make me smile...

so, most nights I wear my hair in a ponytail. I can't stand it being in my face while I sleep, y'see. but my like-a-five-year-old's smooth smooth hair doesn't really *do* ponytails for all that long, and the hairbands inevitably end up collecting in the bed. it's one of the first places I look when I need one!

anyway, last night I was up until ~1245 working on my paper proposal. Between the formatting and reviewing a few more articles, and because my communications committee meeting lasted a little longer than I expected, I just ended up staying up pretty late. And I was wiped before I began the paper proposal.

when I went upstairs matt was already in bed. and this little pink hair rubber band greeted me from my pillow. :)

"so, I hear you don't like my stir sticks..."

~kevin b.

friday night taylor and katie came over to see the new place and enjoy some beer and botanas. we made them with beef this time, patty, the first time I've cooked with beef in...in...well probably since before I bought my house! we used laura's lean beef though, and that made me feel a leeeetle better.

we played apples to apples, enjoyed some pumpkin ale and had a very, very good time!

saturday was a busy, busy day! first, I woke up to take pictures of megan and her doggie, charlie. I promised megan I wouldn't put up any pictures until she had seen 'em, so I've gotta stick to that. though the heat was awful, the pictures turned out just like we wanted. so cute!

I did have a little problem while leaving though. Mattie now has a boo-boo on her tail end. A car was illegally parked and I couldn't/didn't see it while backing up, and their back bumper got up close and personal with mine. My car sustained all the damage and I figure it would cost more to pursue them and their illegally-parked-ness than it would to just replace it myself, or jsut let it go since really all it is is a bent piece of plastic. But it did not put me in a good mood!

Next, I came home and then Matt did something I've been waiting for him to do for quite some time--he took me to see his school! I got to see his classroom and desk and his old rooms and take a little tour. I'd only seen the outside before, so this was a treat!

after some errands and some looks of disbelief at the office depot woman who told me they only carry 35% recycled paper even though they could also carry 100% recycled paper (it says so on the 35% packaging!) because there's not a market for fully recycled paper in this area, I went home, took a short siesta at matt's insistence and went to the KD kickoff at Kitty's.

we talked about kevin and lara's stir stick dilemma and came to the conclusion that a happy medium would be if kevin would use sustainably grown, biodegradable wooden stir sticks. :) I got to meet jennifer's boyfriend for the first time and even hung out with little mister samuel and his parents for a bit--his giggles are SO adorable. oh, and jennifer and I were amused at our matching carriers, particularly since matt and I didn't even bring summer shandy.

went home, did homework, watched some heroes and prepared for sunday's craziness.

first: church. next: meet matt @ brueggers. sweetheart that he is, he went to ross for me to buy some sheets for photographing that day--to either block out the sun or for sitting on--because I was taking nicole's bridal portraits! I also saw Cassie there, and she was coming to help with the portraits, too! we took pictures from about 1245 until 230-outdoors, indoors, in the shade, in the sun, sitting down, standing up, leaning over, etc. There aremore than 450 pictures, and that's not including the ones where her eyes are shut and all! I'm looking forward to showing you these next week-I am VERY pleased with how they turned out!

then, home again to change and nap before youth group, youth from 430 until nearly 7 (parent's meeting and then stayed after for a bit) and then dinner and homework. I only have one15 point problem left and then I just need to write my paper proposal. YIKES.

oh and, a few other little gems...house-related gems.

we changed the direction of our dining room table. It is WAY more functional and inviting, and I like that! Right now it's my homework station, but that should change in time. Before it was up against the wall and the chairs were behind it--difficult to use, but a little bit prettier. Oh well, I'll take function over form this time, especially since the accessibility means we might actually *use* it.

this is in the dining area. the other day I saw this painting in the garage and I knew EXACTLY where it was going. it has every single color in the middle floor in it (or something close enough)--greens, browns, orange and yellow. and even a little blue to pull in the table we have. the painting of the trees that's on the adjacent wall is one I gave to matt a year ago on wednesday, it's a picture from our trip to tyler arboretum, and I plan to hang it right there. I haven't decide what color to paint that kicky little shelf though. I kind of want to do bronze but matt says no! suggestions? how it is now it doesn't "go."

and then here's my chest of drawers with the drawer pulls. it's actually much darker and less stripey, but that's a flash for you. it looks more like the color in the gobi picture. It is SO MUCH easier to use this bad boy with handles, let me tell you. well worth the mulah, for sure.

and here is gobi's fave resting spot. he will sit there ALL DAY. or so it seems. after I shower he gets up there, stays there until I leave and when I come home at night I often find him there as well. silly cat.

hiphiphiphiphiphiphip

hooray!

my little beaut won first place in architecture!!!!


the judge just kept talking about the great graphic elements and lighting and anyway, hooray! :)

he also talked a lot about the photo of matt's sunglass reflection. I think if it had been of, say, an exquisite sunset or a mountain landscape it would've placed. but it was still nice to hear that it was a "very creative landscape" and "such a neat idea" and "perfectly framed."

"she moves in such a way, that I still fall in love with her every single day."

~sk6ers

so, I already loved stephen kellogg and the sixers. the show was FANTASTIC. like, quite possibly one of the best I've ever been to. guster, wilco, even pearl jam might pale in comparison because it felt like you might've gotten to actually know these guys. the avett bros are right up there, though.

I also liked it that they support clif greennotes, which helps emergening artists lessen their carbon footprint! I did find out that there's one little bummer--they sometimes cover wagon wheel, but didn't do it last night.

at the very end they went acoustic and actually walked down into our little crowd. it was super cool. they're the ones in the hats in the picture below. They were singing "see you later, see you soon," which is a great great song, and everyone joined in the singing. amazing, amazing. I bought one of their tour shirts, I'm pretty pumped about it!

and matt said the guy at the bar kept giving him looks as he went to buy his 1 PBR and 1 Blue Moon.

If you aren't familiar with stephen kellogg and the sixers (sk6ers) you can check their music out on their website. I highly recommend Maria, Such a Way, See you Later-See you Soon and 4th of July. And pretty much every other one of their songs. :)

you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.

and that's why I like carbon offsets.

a show of hands...
how many people out there use plastic bags at the grocery store?
buy products in single-serve containers when you could've bought a larger one?
go faster than the speed limit?
take plane trips or boat rides "for fun?"

you get the idea.

if you don't already know, a carbon offset is a way of paying money to offset greenhouse gas emissions. it can be for a business (e.g., a petroleum refinery or power plant) or it can be on an individual level. you generate some type of greenhouse gas in the majority of things you do--hell, even breathing generates CO2, right? But there are much, MUCH larger sources--your temperature-controlled, artificially lit home, your car, your fuel for your car, you get the idea.

so, in ideal land, you will drive less, you will reduce, reuse and recycle (and freecycle!), you will bring reusable grocery bags and buy local and organic and compost and you know the drill! and if you do these things you will, ultimately, produce fewer and fewer and fewer greenhouse gas emissions and contribute less and less and less to the greenhouse effect and global warming.

peachy with a side of keen, yes?

but there are at least three flaws. likely more. I'm sure I'm missing some.

a) you can't get to zero.
unless you hunt for your own wild game, walk everywhere, and live in the elements, you will never get to zero. I, Carrie, try as I may, will never get down to "none."

b) not everyone gives a sh*t, even though they should.
this means that there will be plenty of people who take speedy joyrides in their need-two-ladders-to-get-in-'em trucks, refuse to recycle and.

c) many people don't have control over all aspects of their contribution to greenhouse gases, either. maybe they travel by plane many times a week because their boss says they must. maybe they are a door-to-door salesperson or a pizza delivery guy. maybe they have to print everything in triplicate for record-keeping purposes. maybe they are stuck in a mortgage they can barely afford and their office is a 40 minute drive away and they haven't found a new job yet.

Many (like Christal, but also about a bazillion others) argue that having carbon offsets is simply a license to keep doing what we're doing. for instance, celebrity jet setters. And to some extent, I agree with them. For the rich and famous, I'd agree that this probably IS a common problem. I'd hazard that there are thousands or tens of thousands or more who have huge pockets and just emit that carbon on a whim and figure they'll avoid some scrutiny by offsetting it. People like Mr. DiCrapio are a wee bit hypocritical, methinks. (though ye without eco-sin cast the first stone, hmm?) The offset system can VERY easily be abused and misused. I see why it gives some people a sour taste in their mouth. I do.

But, most people? They don't have the cash to behave in such a carefree fashion. They don't go jetting to France one day 'cause they want to trace the story of the Da Vinci Code or have some really good wine. Unfortunately, a huge number of people don't even care enough to turn off their cars while they run inside a store "just for a minute."

Plus, I think that the people who buy them, or even consider them? They're people like some of you, and people like me--who feel compelled to tread as lightly as possible, people who want to reverse or at least stop the horrible changes that are happening to mother earth.

a little math. fuzzy and pretend, but math nonetheless.

let's say for simplicity US folks emit 150 lb CO2 per day.

let's say that someone reduces their emissions in half. So they're at 75 lb CO2 per day. They cut them in half! that's fantastic!!!

but it's still putting 75lb of CO2 into the air every day. every damn day. what are you going to do, ask 'em to halve it again?

and then let's say they did nothing. well now we have 150 lb CO2 going every day. they were going to have the same habits either way. but if they buy the offset, at least their net effect is zero.

I mean, Matt and I bought them when we went on our roadtrip. I also pay $10 extra month to have my power usage offset, because I'm gonna use the computer and control the temperature in my home and run the dishwasher and use the refridgerator, you know?

And, let's just say that some people do use it as a bandaid to cover up their eco-indiscretions...well, I say let them! Let them fund that wind farm or solar collector. Let them plant some trees. Let them negate it. Encourage them to reduce their emissions, you betcha, but if they won't or can't? Let them undo what they've done.

for now.

when we have our wind farms and we're all using plug in hybrids from solar, hydro and wind plants, maybe we should adjust our thinking, tinker with the process and make it better. but for now, let those jet setters fund our advances in sustainable energy, that's what I say!

with a fierce disposition like the beat of a drum. you get hurt more than others, but you have more fun.

~stephen kellogg and the sixers

We see them TONIGHT! I am listening to them rightthissecond. :)

so, here's something I learned in class yesterday. DO NOT top off your fuel tank when you gas up. or more specifically, why you shouldn't. I had never really thought about it before...but. here are my notes from class. and yes, I write in multiple colors. and by the way, that is paper made from sugar cane.



basically, the area of space above the liquid gas (the headspace) contains airborne hydrocarbons, i.e., gas fumes. so, when you fill up your tank, those guys get forced out, and that's rather unavoidable. even cali's vapor hood thingies on their nozzles don't capture it all. but see that little part at the top, where you put the nozzle in? well, if you're filling it up all the way to there, there's a problem. the gas can't escape properly, which is never good of course, but also? there's a much higher likelihood that you'll drip when you remove the nozzle, and basically that releases A LOT of the fumes into the air. fumes that cause cancer. and poison things. bad bad bad.

yesterday at rock climbing janice gave me these numbers. I'll be using them for my eco-friendly reviews. I like 'em! by the way, she rates EVERYTHING. I linked to her blog on my sidebar, but you can get to it from here as well.

rock climbing was fun, by the way, but I worked hard. and jorge and this guy richard, who told me his name was puddin' were really REALLY encouraging me to keep going on this one wall, and I wasn't so keen on the idea after my fifth try. when I was done I had to rest! By the way, I called him Sour Puddin' for the rest of the night. :) I was pleased that I tried the one that kidney punched me, and I enjoyed myself quite a bit!

and, I am SO excited about this chocolate. SO. if you don't know, I am not a huge sweets person. oh, I enjoy cookies and pumpkin pie and apple and cinnamon anything, don't get me wrong, but I find it very easy to pass up desserts, and I'd rather have fresh fruit most of the time! matt and I saw this at borders over labor day weekend and I couldn't resist. a chocolate bar AND my carbon emissions negated for a day? SWEET! (pun sooooo intended) We're eating it a couple of pieces at a time. And and and, it has little eco friendly tips all over the wrapper!

also, yesterday I picked out my paper topic for my air pollution class. I'll start by using the GREET model to compare emissions from different alternative vehicle technologies. Then I'll take the most promising ones and determine what would happen if in ___ year's time all of the US vehicle fleet were replaced with x, y or z. What problems would we have? What would we have to change or design or alter? What fuel sources would we need to have (or overcome). e.g., for plug in hybrids with biodiesel from microbes (which is my favorite idea for a car, thank you) we'll need the microbes, we'll need more power plants, and we'll need to evaluate the emissions--will we put too much of this or that in the air with those vehicles and just trade our current problems for new ones?

I think this will be verrrry interestink. I will keep you posted!

eco-friendly review #1: method all surface wipes

okay, so, by their very nature, use-once wipes are not exactly what one would call "eco-friendly." in a lot of ways they're just as bad as using a paper towel.

but...

sometimes? sometimes you need a wipe. you don't need a paper towel and you certainly don't need a dish rag. you need a wipe.

so, these wipes get an 8 in the book of Carrie. They are pretty durable--held up very well to multiple uses on the same stain on my kitchen stove and they never tore even after some serious elbow grease.

I was surprised that they didn't have a whole lot of "moisture." I mean, yeah, they had cleanser on them, but I couldn't really see it on the countertop after I wiped and thought it picked up all of the coffee crumbs I guess I just wanted to "see" it working.

Also, the container is a p.i.t.a. I mean, it is superior to the ones that baby wipes and whatnot come in with the plastic top in a cross shape, but this guy is difficult to open AND the wipes sometimes come out 2 or 3 at a time, and then you have to shove the ones you don't want in there.

I liked that they stayed moist though. I don't use wipes very often, so it's nice to know that I won't come back to find them all dried up. Also, I think it is FABULOUS that they are biodegradable and compostable. I put one in my compost and we'll see if I can see it in a few months, hmm? One thing though: if you're ever, say, pre-spraying an area and then using the wipe, make sure that the cleaner you use is biodegradable as well (like other method products, seventh generation, etc). Otherwise, if you put, say, some Easy Off on your wipe, you'll be tainting all of your compost with that icky easy off...and I love it that these guys have no perfumes or dyes, either!

so overall, an 8. if you need discardable wipes, these are a good choice! gobi seems to like them too! (he's in the corner of the picture!)

ps: the number is courtesy of my friend janice.

"it's more like a mountain back there!"

~megan, yet again. on the subject of leggings et al.

for the most part this weekend was a good one. friday night was FANTASTIC, even though matt left work late and even though the red room folks did a poor job of managing reservations. that kind of stuff happens though, so it's all good. lara and kevin took us with them to use the gift certificate they'd purchased from restaurant.com, which is pretty rad. (restaurants advertise with them and offer, say, a $25 gift certificate for $10, sometimes less if they're running a special. they often exclude alcohol and add a gratuity and have a minimum purchase, but even so they're a deal. they got a $50 one for $6 once--that's AWESOME! and they're good for a year)

this was kevin's first night out in two weeks, and he's worked every single one of those days, so he was living it up, and bought himself, matt and me all a shot of liquid heroin. the shots were GIGANTIC and I could feel it coating my insides. yikes. the tapas were yummy, the company was excellent and we had quite the good time talking about how the club music wasn't jiving with the late-night-dinner crowd, ha! SO GLAD to have gone with them, so glad so glad.

saturday morning's rain ruined the photo shoot potential (and yes, ariel, we were wet!), and even though it was sunny at 1045 the ground was still soaking, and her pretty dress would've likely been dirty after. We are trying again for next weekend, so cross your fingers for me. I got up and was suddenly motivated to get the crap out of the kitchen, unpack some books, etc. It may not look like much, but I found our countertops!!! There are things on them in this picture, too, but at least they are all kitchen-related items. :) I'm hoping to get a bit more finished before friday night. we shall see. and I also organized more of my shelf! still very much a work in progress, but it's getting there!

after that I took a nap--a twenty minute nap turned into two hours when matt chose not to wake me--and we got ready and went over to the white's for sean's birthday party. I took exactly one picture of people while I was there, and that was when I was showing megan my camera since she's looking to buy a new one! But here's a pic of all the girls that I stole from facebook. :)

oh, and I played quarters. speed quarters to be precise. I hadn't played quarters since...since...last june, maybe? yeah, and that is the only other time I've ever played! I like speed quarters better though. I always like it when it feels like a competition!

sunday was a busybusy day. church of course, and more of the what-part-do-I-sing stuff, 'cause our director keeps changing me from soprano to alto depending on what he needs, which is usually fine, except that I sometimes get tired of re-learning pieces...but anyway, after church ran two errands, including one to michael's, where I got this loverly mirror for $7 on clearance. I didn't even know for sure where I'd put it, but I had decided I NEEDED it. and it was returnable. :) It is going in our bedroom, see?

after that and a quick trip to earthfare I went home to eat lunch and chill for ~40 min and then went right back to church at 3. We had our youth kickoff, which was like the olympics. I was on the green team, and we did quite well, I must say. This is when we were fishing--I was blindfolded and had to take one bite off the donut, swallow it and then take a second bite, all based on directions from the fisherman and without allowing the donut to touch the ground!

While here my friend Beth and I utilized our earlier flash of brilliance--so, I have a citipass book I bought last fall. I bought it from Beth, and it has LOTS of local coupons, many of which are buy one get one free. Matt and I have easily saved $50-$100 with this, maybe more. It's like an entertainment book, but I like it better and it has more local things.

Anyway, so the time has come to buy this year's book, and I said something to her about how even if you don't use all the coupons it's such a good deal! And she asked which coupons I didn't use, and we got to talking and quickly realized that the ones she wants (to things like the toy store by her house or for fast food or chargrill) aren't the ones I want (to bogarts, bloomsbury bistro, etc). There's some overlap of course (bruegger's, for instance!) but overall it was quite the case of one person's trash is another's treasure. AND she gave me an entertainment book since she'd ended up with three (only bought one) and it expires in December. And when we get our new books, we're switching again, hooray! Other people saw us doing the switch and were all like "Why didn't we think of that, that is SO smart!"

yay. :)

lectionary text and frustration.

but not about each other. :)

yesterday we heard about matthew chapter 18, verses 15-20.

in the NIV version it says

¹⁵"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. ¹⁶But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' ¹⁷If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

¹⁸"I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.

¹⁹"Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. ²⁰For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."

It got me thinking...about the night before, about recent situations and even about my past. I had been thinking of some of it anyway, but the rest of the sermon kind of got my mind going...

When I was five years old we lived in Tuscon, Arizona. It was there that I played atari, saw a vhs movie (gremlins!)at home for the first time, cut my finger while cutting an apple, got the scar on my upper lip when I insisted on wearing my superslick maryjanes even though it had been raining (evidence of my stubborn nature!), saw someone pull the tail off of a rattlesnake, had the most literal moment of my whole life, learned the word calendar, felt Anna's pain when she broke her arm, played soccer, watched hot air balloon races and many, many other things. It was also in Tuscon that I learned how to ride a bike.

I was still using my training wheels because I wasn't very good at keeping my balance yet, but I was allowed to bike by myself as long as I stayed in our (rather large) cul-de-sac. All of the people in our little neighborhood knew who Anna and I were, and there were plenty of people out and about at any given time. I got going too fast from one of the higher up parts and was too scared to turn or stop, and I ended up running square into my neighbor's newly painted white garage. I was terrified. And by some kind of grace no one saw me, so I walked my bike home, about 5 houses away, and went inside.

That evening my mom said one of the SuchandSuches had come by, and was there anything I wanted to tell her? I lied and said no, and went to my room and probably cried. The next day she asked me again and I told her the truth. I was in BIG trouble, had to apologize with a card and in person, and I'm pretty sure I had to do something else (though I know it wasn't paint the garage because there's no quality control for a 5 year old painter!).

I remember it still because I was SO humiliated. I couldn't believe that I--little brilliant carrie--had been so stupid and scared as to run into their garage, but I was even more ashamed that I had lied to my mother and hid something from my neighbor, and that someone had caught me walking away, too.

It was then that I adopted honesty as a policy. (I adopted a lot of policies as a child, ask me about my accent some time) Oh, don't get me wrong, I have most definitely lied since then. Absolutely 100 percent. Ones ranging from little white to whatever color lies shouldn't be--black I guess? Honesty is an excellent policy, but on rare occasions it is not the best one. But anyway.

So I've had a couple of instances recently where I really feel like I can't win. I'd tell you all the details, but some of the people involved read this blog, and though I can air my own dirty laundry, I don't feel like I have the right to air theirs. (and, a little aside, before this bites me in the ass: if at any point of reading this you are upset? that means you are taking it personally, and no offense, but you shouldn't be. this is about ME. how I feel and what is frustrating me. it is not meant to be negative toward you, it's to let me write it out, and unless you are absolutely certain you know the full details of my goings on, then you probably don't even know what it's about, and it's quite possible it isn't about you at all. thanks.)

I really feel like sometimes I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. Much like the garage door--I was going to get in trouble either way, it was a just a matter of how much was at myself and how much was other people being mad at me. And in that case it TOTALLY makes sense. I did something wrong, I should experience repercussions. But, I have found that no amount of being honest, no amount of shutting my yap, no amount of kindness, and no amount of explanation are making things work.

If I tell someone the truth? It seems I'm still going to suffer the consequences, even though I was the one who was honest, and even if there are many other responsible parties. It makes me think of shooting the messenger. It is against my nature not to be forthcoming, but I guess I may have to select my times to provide information more selectively. If I hadn't been honest though? I would've felt like I had lied about the garage all over again. This frustrates the hell out of me, because I am not doing a single thing wrong in telling the truth (the item I tell about, perhaps, but not in the telling), and I am sick and tired of the drama. It's like if you tell someone they have something in their teeth and they get mad at you for embarrasing them in front of other people--hello?!? you had SPINACH on display in your pearly whites. geez. anyway.

If I avoid providing information? It seems certain that someone else will be so kind as to share that information for me, and if I'm especially lucky, it was either a)something I said in confidence or b)something followed by "carrie knew, I can't believe she didn't tell you." ugh. Along with this, if I present an idea or suggestion, suddenly I am undermining someone's hard work. I felt this was last spring with the dinner theater when I made a schedule showing how we could practice without overlap. we didn't even use it ONCE, and it was indicated to me that I was new, and that I didn't know what I was doing, depsite the fact that my little schedule solved 3/4 of our practice problems.

If I try to explain where I'm coming from, or what I meant? It sure seems a lot of people don't give a shit. And personally, I think that if that's you, you need to take a lesson from this man, my good friend nick, because he is the best forgiver and forgetter I've ever had the pleasure to know.

I guess...sometimes I just feel really helpless. And it makes me think of my friend Renee who once commented on how I have so many friends, and that's because I can be friends with people on a lot of different levels. She does not have as many friends as I do (though for the record she's just as cool), but that's because she is really only friends with people on one level, if that makes sense. But she also has fewer friend issues than I end up having, and I wonder if that's a factor related to quantity or level-of-closeness/friendship? I dunno. Just thoughts I'm thinkin'.

I am not even sure where I'm going with this, entirely. I am a talk-it-through-er is all, and maybe I'm wondering if anyone has any sage advice? My grandmother told me that I know better than this--I am smart, I have manners, I make friends easily and I have self worth--I need to not associate with people who make me feel like this. I told her that, depending on who we're talking about, a lot of the time they don't make me feel like that, that I have friends who are super fun, and I truly enjoy their company the rest of the time. I think she responded about would I have stayed with a man who beat me, but only twice a month? I think she has a point.

Plus, do I want to be a part of things where I feel like I can't be myself? That's another decision that I made quite a while ago--after seeing people be two faced I made a conscious decision to try to be the same person all the time, as much as possible. I can't say I've got that 100%, but I can tell you that for the most part carrie at work is carrie at church, carrie at a bar and carrie at home, too. It's important to me, really.

anyway. I'm not liking september. I'm not liking drama. I'm not liking thinking these things. and I'm not liking this blog today. read it now, I very well may delete it later. :)

i live my life on the third floor.

I just commute on the ground. seriously.

I mean, my house is three stories, right? And my bedroom? It's on the third floor. Granted, I spend a few hours on the middle floor cooking, watching TV, etc...but on any given day I usually spend more time upstairs.

My job is on the third floor. I spend A LOT of time here.

and my class? guess what? it's on the third floor too!

I think that's kind of an odd coincidence. I mean, every day I walk down two flights of stairs, go somewhere, go up two flights of stairs and either go to work or class, and if it's class I have another two flights to go down, then drive, then go up. Only to go down two flights, drive home, and eventually go up two more! That's quite a few stairs, people!

The past two nights we have been fortunate enough to open our windows at night. It has been VERY nice. And I'm hoping we'll see the difference in our energy bill. We had fans running to bring in the colder air, but I still think we saved by opening 'em up. And last night I actually got a little cold while I slept and pulled on another blanket, which was nice.

Question though--when we open our window and raise the blind a little the streetlight shines in. Last night I grabbed a pillow and propped it in front of the window to block the light. I'm thinking about just taping a piece of paper up on the window. It's on the back side of the house, third story, three houses in from the curb--think anyone will notice and/or complain to the HOA? My other option is to request that they change the light--my mom did that for our house on 36th street because there was a light across the street at Eliot that would shine DIRECTLY INTO MY FACE while I was sleeping.

yesterday I did something I haven't really done in TEN YEARS. I changed my earring. My little one in my cartilage I've had pierced since I was 17. I changed it to a turquoise post. It is less noticeable, I suppose, but really I just got the urge to try changing it. However, I had to take it out last night to sleep, and I am lazy, so that might get me to put the hoop back in again.

oh, and today I feel like a NERD. I'm wearing my glasses, an old-man-sweater cardigan and have my hair pulled back on the sides. I hardly ever wear cardigans and I certainly don't ever pull my hair back--but today I felt so inclined. nerd nerd nerd. thank goodness my shoes are silver or I'd feel suuuuuper nerdtastic.

and finally, here's a picture I took this morning from my kitchen window. I like it. :)

happy friday, folks. I know I'm glad it's here! this weekend includes a double date, bridal portraits for my friend nicole (weather permitting, which is iffy), a birthday party at the white's and the youth kickoff on sunday. and hopefully some cleaning, heroes episodes, organizing and sleeping!

"a little too ironic, and yeah I really do think..."

~ms. morrisette, herself.

remember when that song was popular? like, when a lot of us where in our teens. I asked for that cd for my birthday one year and got FOUR copies. ha!

so, last night I went to help with the preference card signing for unc. I did it last year and it was actually pretty fun. I enjoy talking to the girls and I get a thrill when I see them put kaydee as their first choice. There were a couple of girls who suicided as well (if you don't know, that means selecting only a single house that you want to be in, reducing your likelihood of being placed) and that made me sad. Not everyone has an amazing sorority experience, but I think in like 98% of cases, it is somewhat beneficial. Of course, you're talking to a gal who is still highly involved in her sorority and in panhellenic, so my viewpoint might be skewed.

well, last night lara also delivered my purchase--remember when I went to that spa night and bought the unscented hand lotion? as we waited for the girls I was reading the container, and saw something that I HAD to share with lara and jennifer. do you see it?

...

yeah, SUNBURN ALERT. I pick the unscented lotion for my hands, which get more sun exposure than, what 85% of your body, and it has something in it that will make me even more susceptible to sunburn. rock. seriously???? I showed matt and he said "so, who are you going to give that to as present?" I was surprised that he didn't ask me if I'd only use it at night, and then I noticed it said to avoid the sun/protect yourself for a WEEK afterwards. you have GOT to be kidding. With my luck, I'd burn from just the fluorescent lighting in my office!

Also, last night I felt inclined to take a picture of something on our fridge...the nice pad of paper renee gave me in my bridesmaid gift, and two paint keys on a hook. We keep them there to use as beer bottle openers. Yes, really. We have multiple perfectly good bottle openers, but regularly use the paint keys instead. You see, if you want to get the bottle lid off without bending it, like we do? Then the best tool we've found is a paint key! Try it, you might like it. We found out on accident of course, having beer while we were painting and realizing we didn't have an opener...but now it's pretty much all we use!

and finally, after class today I paused to take a picture of the car next to me. the girl had MANY MANY bumperstickers on her car (I saw her park when I was still gathering my things before class) and this was one of my favorites. there were quite a few good ones!

I am SO GLAD this is a short week. so, SO glad. and I'm also glad that I get my hair cut tonight!

gentlemen may cry peace, peace...but there is no peace.

~patrick henry

so. this is political, but not in the who-are-you-for kind of way. I feel obligated to inform you before I go into politics at all. :)

I was talking to my granny the other day about the candidates and she said that she thinks that it's really important that our president have a military background and military experience. like, actual combat experience...

and here's the thing: so, let's just say that my grandmother represents your average middle class conservative, as far as her beliefs and ideas go (and honestly she's likely not too far off, though certainly older and a bit more old-fashioned)...so if the average conservative thinks it's so important that our presidents always have military/combat experience--in this election or any presidential election--well...

doesn't that mean that they are counting on us continuing to go to war?!?

I mean, not that they want war. The process is really not good for anyone, even if it produces something good in the ultimate outcome. Personally I'd really like it if in 12 or 20 or 40 years, the subject of combat experience didn't even come up since we'd been at peace for so long...

what did the pink panther say when he stepped on an ant?

dead ant, dead ant... dead ant dead ant dead ant, dead ant dead aaaant...

ah, greenness. some things to share with you...but first, a story.

we have ants. not in our pants, sillies. in our house. on the first AND second floor. I have tried cayenne pepper and salt. I felt like using borax in sugar water to dehydrate them was as cruel as using salt on slugs. we've been fighting them for two days! we broke down and bought some stuff that was safe for pets and was for indoor and outdoor use. I feel bad for using chemicals, but we couldn't even find the trail, and the other remedies didn't work. :( this story is true, but telling it was mostly an excuse to tell the old pink panther joke!

so back to the greenness...
exhibit a: the green guide.

this magazine is AWESOME. it comes out six times a year and it is FABULOUS. of course they buy offsets for all of their waste/carbon/etc, and for this I love them. it talks about all sorts of green stuff--eco friendly school supplies, how to save water, greening your home one step at a time, why doing this or that is really important, what impact it will have, etc.

I have read all three of the issues they've put out so far, and I have been SUPER impressed, so I have subscribed. I am excited. And it's a deal--$5 a pop or $15 for the year? The year, please! I think you should try it too!

things I learned in the first twenty-ish pages of this issue--you can blame climate change for your allergies. Did you know that ragweed used to only grow east of the mississippi? Did you know that Tuscon, AZ used to be a haven for people with allergy issues, but no longer is because its residents have insisted upon importing non-native trees to the area? And, did you know that with this overall climate change, plants are changing their growth cycles, so what used to be two months of allergy problems are now three? wow.

exhibit b: e-cover.
I'm trying their non-chlorine laundry bleach and their dishwashing powder. I must admit, I'm a huge fan of the effects of bleach on my whites. I don't wash without it. Well, until recently, when I've been looking for substitutes! these will probably be my first green reviews!

exhibit c: the ocean.
(there's a pun in there, did you catch it? oh, and now two!)
we're ruining it, but I'm sure you already knew that. bleaching corals, changing the pH, etc etc. did you know that unmitigated the ocean might raise 7 meters in height? SEVEN METERS, people! that's from that thermal expansion I told you about and from the melting of the icecaps. which, it seems that of all of our great fifty states? alaska has the most to lose from them melting (and as far as people of the world go will be the most affected as well). I'd like to say something political now. I'm not going to.

do you realize how tall that is? nearly 23 feet. roughly four people tall. more than two stories of your average building completely underwater. wow.

exhibit d: light emitting diodes. aka leds.
as many other brilliant people have stated before me, I betcha these little guys are going to be the light bulbs of the future. matt got a rechargable flashlight with these lovely leds in it. they last six times as long and use less energy. it'll be a little while before they develop, but when they do... It's kind of like how we might have to drill in alaska (shudder!) in the interim while we develop cleaner energy and end our reliance on oil, foreign or otherwise.

exhibit e: speaking of which, oil.
did you know that ~30% of our oil comes from foreign countries? it's less than I thought, because of all the fuss we've been making about it. It blows my mind that we can't just cut back by 30%. Drive less. Carpool. Use solar power or wind power or hydro power or hell, burn a friggin beeswax candle already! I've been reading a lot about emissions for my class, and that's a whole other post. I firmly believe that anyone who isn't for pollution mitigation and prevention should have to take an air pollution class. If they still stand beside their non-recycling, gas guzzling ways (and I don't just mean SUVs, more than just cars use gas, and with gas prices lots of SUV drivers are being more mileage-conscious anyway!) then so be it.

exhibit f: and that brings us to recycling.
this is simply me complaining.
a) dude, recycle already. even my eighty year old granny is doing it. she was so impressed with how matt and I collected our recyclables in oklahoma that she's decided to do it too. one hundred years later they are finding perfectly intact newspapers, milk jugs and the like in landfills. it saves energy, reduces pollution, and it will make you less selfish. seriously. even if it costs you ten bucks a month to have them pick it up at the curb, it is worth it. for your grandchildren's sake, k?
b) I have become a bit of an eco snob, I admit it. Now, there are some perfectly good reasons for drinking bottled water--I have a friend who does so at the recommendation of a doctor, for instance, and if I am parched and reusable-bottle-less, let me tell you, I will pick up a bottle at the store. I don't like doing it, but in a pinch, I will (and I'll recycle). But I was kind of annoyed to see that in my class of 20 people on monday there were FIVE people with bottled water. I'm pretty sure they could've just as easily brought their own bottle. Maybe they were reusing that bottle (which is not a good thing to do either but anyway), but really? We're in an air pollution class, people. You take it to be an air pollution engineer! And by the way, it's odd that our prof won't let us write on the back of the homework papers--um, isn't that making us use twice as much paper? riiiiight.

one more to go...

exhibit g: takin' out the trash.
as I've mentioned before, I use biobags when I scoop my kitty litter. (yes, kitty litter is bad. I've been looking into alternative) and the nice cheese people at the farmers market use biobags, too! they are great, they are. but...apparently even these corn polymers are problematic. some photodegrade just like plastic bags, and there are no tests showing they'll decompose in sealed off landfills. they are DEFINITELY still a better choice than your regular old glad bags, they are. but apparently the best choice is a trash bag made from recycled plastic! seventh generation has some that I'll be trying, but I have yet to find doggy poo bags to use for my cats. we shall see.

and now, exhibits are over for the time being. :)

oooh ooh AND. I played a little game called stump the professor in class on tuesday. he asked the following question:

is recycling pollution prevention?
(vote then read on)

poll by twiigs.com

okay, well, so the class was COMPLETELY silent. for like a full minute. and finally I said "I don't think so." Of course he asked why, and I explained "well, you're still creating the pollution. you just happen to be reusing it. but you certainly aren't preventing it." someone else disagreed, saying that since you weren't releasing the pollution, and therefore were preventing it. end of pipe v. literal pollution.

there was more debate and then I said "well, okay, so, let's say that stream that you're recycling in the plant and calling it 'pollution prevention'--let's say that instead you take that very same stream and send it to another facility, one that doesn't fit in the big box that is your plant--would you argue that was pollution prevention?"

my professor said "um, wow. that's a really good question, a really good question--and I'm not really sure I have an answer." he proceeded to talk about park benches made from recycled plastic bottles and whatnot, but said, yeah, he'd never heard that point brought up in a discussion about pollution prevention before.

it kind of made my day. :)

"that is the most idiotic thing I've ever heard!"

~lila mae

(if you don't want to hear about politics, even briefly/vaguely, just skip on down below the asterisks, pretty please)

in case you don't know, that's my granny, and she said that in response to learning that mccain's running-mate doesn't believe that humans have had any effect on climate change. my granny, the staunch, hardcore republican, because of whom I initially registered republican because I was afraid she would, quite literally, disown me if she found out I had selected independent. thankfully I was able to actually discuss things with her and let her know I'm a democrat now. I saw this on kara's blog and it made me giggle, so I'm sharing!

*************************************************

right, enough of that. I have things to share with you that are green and eco, but I shall save that for another post. I'm actually considering trying out and reviewing green/eco things on a weekly or every-other-weekly basis. What do you think?

friday night, we bowled. we did the little fun pack thingie and it was wonderfully grand to be in such fine company! the newfangled contraption (aka their upgrade scoring system) wouldn't let us pick a gender, but it ended up being more entertaining in the long run. I got at least, what, 5 strikes in the two and a half games? I almost turkied twice! And if you got a strike, sometimes a face would come up on the screen and give you a thumbs up, so we mimicked...see?

saturday I went to the durham farmer's market with my dear friend jennifer. it was fun to go with someone who was just as excited about produce as I was--actually, perhaps even more excited than I was! I bought some eggplant and bell peppers, tomatoes, garlic and a tshirt, too. AND got a free magnet. It was a very good trip, though we were both disappointed not to find basil. But we got opal basil, and that's a pretty deelish substitute!

After that we went to portabello road, and I got that sunflower pyrex dish I'd been lusting after! They had priced three items together but let me just get the two I wanted, and I was quite thankful. jennifer also gave me a little gift--which interestingly enough I'd been contemplating purchasing when matt's parents were in town. I'm either going to use the one that says "polluted" or the one that says "hammered" (since my bowling nickname is the hammer!). Matt looked at 'em and told me that--and I had already figured that out on my own. :)

I took Matt to chapel hill to tailgate for the UNC game that evening and paid a little visit to whole foods and trader joes. yes, this is a picture of my cart. everything in it was local, organic and/or "green." I thought that warranted taking a picture. I kind of got lost in the store though, reading labels, checking out displays and personal care products, etc. And I hadn't intended to go to trader joe's, but it was in the parking lot where hold your own used to be, and I couldn't resist. I found out they let you buy just one of a beer AND they don't charge you extra for it, and that little gem will come in handy!

That evening I watched (wait for it, Kat) one of my favorite movies from forever ago, The Last Unicorn. I used to have dreams about the red bull and the skull and mommy fortuna and king haggard. I remember learning the word haggard and realizing that's why they'd named him that. I didn't remember all of it though, and I'd never noticed so many of the wise quips within the dialogue. It was kind of awesome to watch!

Then, Matt came home earlier than expected and accompanied me to the flying saucer for Karen's going away party--she is going to grad school in england and leaves in two weeks! It was super FUN. I have no idea why Karen and I never managed to hang out after thermo was over (maybe it brought back haunting memories of horrible tests?) but that was totally a mistake. Fortunately we can keep in touch while she's gone and get together when she returns. And I added her blogs to my list! :) Also, I found out who someone was--a guy on an opposing softball team always looked familiar...turns out I actually had met him once before, at a party with karen! he said he wouldn't recognize me without my tulsa shorts, which I think confirms my suspicion that those are going to have to stay at home from now on! ha! we had some icky beers, some yummy beers and some excellent catching up. I am SO glad we ended up going out!

sunday I slept. and slept. and slept. and slept. ah, sleep. and made dinner. and slept. I think we also watched a movie at some point and ran some errands. and I got some handles for my chest of drawers I repainted. they're special order, but after looking for like 20 minutes matt and I were both certain that I would LOVE these and that they were worth the extra $20 total. it's funny, I've spent more than twice as much on handles for this piece of furniture as I paid for the dang thing! but it is handy and I like it, and that is all that matters, right? I do need to sell the old ones, though...

and then monday I didn't even leave the house all day! slept some more, watched must love dogs, did homework, moved a huge honkin' armoire upstairs--the one that matt's parent's brought him--and then let my poor elbow rest! we had kabobs for dinner and they were yum. I made the marinade from bohemia beer and adobo seasoning, and matt could not stop talking about how good the chicken was! and despite our fear we both tried the grilled eggplant and thought it was just fine. and we watched much love dogs, too!

the only sad note to an otherwise fantastic weekend was that last night I realized that it's been a year since I last saw my granddaddy, and that that was the last time I'd ever see him. I told matt that on our way out of the care center place--that every time I left I was worried that I'd never see my granddaddy again. I'd cried each time I left in december and in june, too. I was surprised at how much I cried when the thought came to me. :( His picture is still up in my office and at home, and though it makes me sad I also find it comforting. I miss him often, but I usually miss him the most when I hear a joke he would love and I cannot tell him since he's not here to hear it. I think september is going to be a bit of a melancholy month for me, but I guess that means it's a good thing that it's busy so it'll fly by, hmm?

sorry for the sad...off to the happier. tomorrow or later today I'll give you some greenie updates, and that'll be more fun, hmm?