i. just. can't. believe. it.

ugh.

so, we're going to go in semi-reverse chronological order here. 'cause that's what I feel like doing.

last night I made yummy chicken with paprika sauce and had dinner with Susan and Kim. We had fun. We ate, had wine, laughed about my toe (man, I love laughing so hard I cry--it rocks.) They told about their travels, we talked about boys and Susan gave me some rather terrible news. Not terrible for me anymore, but pretty dis-damn-gusting in general. My old boss, my first boss, the one who sexually harassed me, has been promoted at my old company. To the Vice-President level. I still can't believe how he just slithered through the system like a damn snake. This marks the official beginning of the company going to the shitter--and if you know where I used to work, you know what a wonderful pun that is. :)

sunday was a busy and fun day. got up for church, ran errands, had a yummy latte, took an (accidental) nap and enjoyed wine, chinese takeout, a cigar and garden state. quite fun, quite fun.
saturday was more eventful--my photo thing was rescheduled, so I had brunch at brig's with Kim, Stefan and Matt and then spent the day with Matt and Kim, going to Duke Gardens and a wine tasting, having sushi and playing a card game called Wizard. Again. See: pretty pictures.

I'm spiffing these up to put on my photo site soon!

and friday was bowling. I REALLY like bowling. And while I thought the notion was ridiculous on Friday when someone suggested it, truth be told the idea of having my own pink bowling ball is actually really appealing! here's the KD ladies bowling in bowlers. ah, the punnity. That's all the ladies and then Elizabeth and me. Very cute. Many fun pictures were taken, perhaps I'll upload more soon...these were all the ones I had "touched up."

oh and two more things I can't believe....
1. I FINALLY uploaded some more pictures. check 'em out! (and thanks, brooke!)
2. I think I'm going to take the GRE on Monday. Like a week from yesterday. I think. I still need to register. But that's the plan for now. I think I'm a little nutso. But that's cool by me. :)

and now, more labbage. for that's what I do. constantly. icks.

mondays hurt.

well, I knew I'd have to even it up eventually.

my right pinkie toe? yeah. ouch.

I'd been at work for .25 minutes and I'd already managed to open a door into my foot, bruise my pinkie toe and tear a hole in my cute shoe.

I just put ice on it, took some ibuprofen and put some scotch tape over the tear until I can superglue it at home. And then, as I left my cube, I hit my foot on a box that's in my office. And by this time I'd been at work for like 12.25 minutes. splendid, dammit.

yeah. swell start to the week. sigh.

more later.

another corner of my home.

y'all have seen this before, but never with my stuff in it.

fun things:

my china. oooOOooh. still haven't ever used it. but I like to admire it.

the cow that serves creamer. soooo wrong. also, I was downright giddy when I saw that lorelai and rory have one of these on gilmore girls (theirs is painted). i had to go back in the show and point it out to otto to be sure!


and these are all pretty. I'm not a "blue" girl but it all goes nicely with the green cabinet--the blue-gray in my china and then these three items. The vase is something my Granny gave me. It is old. And I've always loved it. My mom gave me the bluebird. And I bought the butterflies at the durham farmer's marker. aw...this makes me miss my family.


i heart this china cabinet. it's the first time I've ever fallen for a piece of furniture. i lusted over it. i thought about it. i found my mind wandering to it. and I couldn't help but buy it. i hope to have it for ever and ever. and ever. the end.

i've got two songs stuck in my head.

get them out, get them out!!! kidding.

One: I went to the dentist yesterday to get my teeth cleaned. I’ve been using this icky fluoride stuff at night for a few weeks now, and guess what—it worked!!! That icky periodontal disease that was a-growin’ in my gums has cleared up. I have normal “numbers.” And I’ve got those happy [teeth] give them a low down beat, and they begin dancing…

Ah, Kermit the frog, how I love thee. Muppets=awesome.

I am so so pleased about this gum thing. It’s damn good news. And normally I don’t get that kind of news if my teeth are involved.

Two: Day-o, me say day ay ay-o. Daylight come an me wan’ go home. So, I’ve got a banana problem. I have “a beautiful bunch of ripe bananas!” and I keep forgetting to take them to work and eat them. Which means they turn brown. So I stick them in my freezer to keep with the full intention of thawing them later and making banana bread. ‘cept I can’t find a recipe I like. Anybody got one? No nuts please. I like nuts, I like banana bread, but I don’t like ‘em together.

Come mister tally man and tally me banana…

Ooh, and. Would you eat them in a box? Would you eat them with a fox? Do you find yourself thinking of someone in particular when you’re cleaning the ring off the bathrub? Do you know about the butter battle? Or when Horton heard a Who? Or about stars on thars? Or the Grinch who Stole Christmas?

If you know do, even just a little then go do this. It’s easy. And free. And let another child know about the wonders of Seussian Logic.

also, some funnies. this was attached to my bridesmaid dress that arrived in the mail. it made me laugh out loud. jess=silly.

when renee and I tried on the dress we both commented on the boning. apparently only extremely well endowed women wear this dress. because holy moly.

and? I took a picture of my ear yesterday. for renee. and no, you can't see it.

and that's why I heart my bffs. :)



today is a fruit shirt day, another good thing. i got it in dallas (at ross of course) and R&J thought I was a little nutso at first, but now they understand it's very carrie.

here's me wearing it in dallas. it looks cute, no? even dmitry likes it!

Happy Friday! Corners of my home coming soon! and tonight? I BOWL!

and is anybody else thinking "beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice?"

celebrating the collective power of women.

past, present and future.

Today is International Women's Day. It's celebrated all over the world, and it recognizes women in a (still) male-dominated world. It's a big deal. We should all learn more.

Have y'all heard the commercials on the radio? Here on wknc they've been playing one about women--how we're an untapped resource. How there's so much we could do if given the tools. How educating women changes societies, how it brings about good, how it's so important. And to think--all those thoughts and ideas and concepts are stored away inside of these uneducated women--someone just needs to give them the tools to bring them out.

The slogan is "ending impunity for violence against women and girls." I shudder to even think about thinking about the things that happen to women and are just swept under the rug. But we all know they do. Violence against females is the most common but least punished crime in the world. It's a big deal.

This is one of those times when I feel like there's not really anything I can do to improve the situation. But what I CAN do is understand. And tell. And know. (because, to quote a very-manly cartoon, knowing is half the battle.)

today I am proud to be a woman.

and I'm pleased to know that all around the world women are being recognized.

never is enough (yeah never is enough)

~barenaked ladies

I think I’m feeling a little disenchanted today. Today I volunteered at this awesome thing called Expanding Your Horizons, and I spent a lot of my morning talking to this really cool lady named Sharon. She’s got her PhD in industrial engineering. And though I really enjoyed our convo it got me thinking…

eh. Why’s it gotta be so hard? Sometimes I find myself wondering—isn’t an ABET-accredited bachelors in chemical engineering enough?!? Didn’t I get (what is considered by most to be) the hardest, most grueling, most difficult undergraduate degree there is?

And yet, I work for four years and I want to go to law school. Because it isn't enough. I want to flee from science research, despite my four years of o-chem research and my two awesome internships. Because being an engineer is sucking hard. It is not fun, and I do not like it, Sam I Am. There’s no challenge, there’s no drive, there’s not even good deadlines to get all hyped up about. There’s just the drone mentality and a constant reminder that my BS is puny and insufficient in my field. Pisses me off…

I mean, I'm not asking for the world here. I think maybe I want to know when it's okay to stop? Or if I should keep going?

Maybe I need to go another route. maybe maybe maybe. I could sooooo be a patent lawyer, and it has all of these things on my wants-in-a-job-for-carrie checklist, but I don’t know if my heart is in it. I’m really excited at the prospect, but I’m not sure if it appeals to my heart or to my logic. Perhaps I should figure that out. But then again, does it matter? and in the job-world, shouldn’t logic win? Should I just try for another (potentially annoying) job? Questions beget questions. In the meantime I think I’ll go through the motions to keep my options open. (which means taking the GRE and applying)

I think what made me the saddest was seeing this little eighth grader who is all into physics. Albert Einstein and Issac Newton are her heroes. And she even did her 7^th grade science fair project on the theory of freaking relativity. I told her to follow her dreams, but immediately wondered whether or not she’d ever be able to do “enough.” And if she’d ever get to be a real physicist. And it made me think of--

You get your Ph.D
How happy you will be
When you get a job at Wendy's
And are honored with employee of the month

right. soooo moving on. depress-o-dwelling isn’t fun for anybody! and, um, excuse my ramblings. I think I'm just in a weird mood--I mean, after volunteering for this trying to give back, since it was this kind of a thing that made me want to be all science-ee in the first place, it wasn't peachy with a side of keen to leave realizing I'm doing what I thought I wanted to do and not liking it.

Mmmm so. good things good things good things. Ooh, I know!

~I have a fun weekend coming up. In two days!
~It is sooo close to being Friday!
~I've taken two baths this week. Yay!
~I landed that photography gig for the car, which makes me extra pleased. I might be taking the pics this weekend!
~Mary Alise is gonna come to Oklahoma with me in June!
~I have a legitimate excuse to buy pink tennis balls! (I have to work on the strength of my left hand, my guitar teacher is baffled by how hard of a time I'm having....)
~And I started counting—I may knock as many as five (or even seven if we drive to the four corners) states off my list between now and the end of the year!!! Maybe even more, who knows what will come my way?!?

ah, there. I feel better now.

every other day, every other day, every other day of the week is fine, yeah...

but whenever [Sunday] comes, but whenever [Sunday] comes you can find me cryin' all of the time

~the mamas and the papas

Mmmhmmm.

Okay, honestly, Sunday was actually really fun. Despite the sickness and the not-dressing appropriately.

We went to church in dresses that were soooo not warm enough. But Del had a dress, and I had agreed to dress likewise, so, we went. Thank goodness for that Oklahoma-girl-jean jacket. (And for that supercute $16 Ross-Dress-For-Less dress Jessica and Renee helped me pick out!) I did not sing in the choir ‘cause I woke up feeling just awful and we almost skipped church altogether. I really liked the sermon though. When I move I will really miss this church. So. Much. It makes me kind of sad just thinking about it.

As the day wore on I felt better. After putting on warmer clothes we went for the tour de durham. It included 9^th street and lunch at George’s Garage.

A trip to Brightleaf square to see Fowlers and Morgan’s Imports and all. (and a lot of pictures—including one of the pretty pretty saucer magnolia!)

And a visit to the ballpark and the American Tobacco District. We didn’t hit Duke, but I’m not very familiar with the campus anyway. Maybe next time? Or when Jackie comes to visit (hint, hint)? And, Del and I figured out how to use our timers on our cameras!

Then it was nap time, grocery time and pizza-making time. Del, Mary Alise, Betsy, Kim and Stefan and I all enjoyed some of my home-made pizza. It was a hit, which made me happy. Alas, I was so busy in the kitchen and directing my cooking-helpers that I didn’t take any pictures. But per usual, it was fun to see my friends getting along. And? All the dishes were in the washer before they left, even though it took two loads! I practiced my gee-tar (yay for not procrastinating toooo much and yay for Del for making me!) and Del and I went to bed.

That was pretty much the end of our adventure except for driving the 1.5 hours to the airport yesterday. Taking 264 was soooo much better than taking 70. And? I saw this on the way there and stopped on the way back to capture it for posterity. How fun, how fun?!?

i would walk [three-point-one] miles and I would walk [three-point-one] more.

~the proclaimers.

And that’s a lie. I’m not walking ANYMORE. My legs and shins hurt, man. We've walked A LOT this weekend. Enough to justify whatever beer we wanted, thankyouverymuch!

So, Kinston, NC? Middle of Nowhere, USA. And a weird drive. But I made it and picked up Del, and we’ve had a glorious time!!!

Except for the walking part.

This Saturday was the Beta Chi Shamrock’n’Run. Except, y’know, we walked the 5k. Which isn't really that far, and it was pleasant, except for the damn hills. We just walked a lot the rest of the time, too--and we were not the last people in, hurrah! Oh, and I won a hat. A UNC hat. Which I will soooooooooo be selling. Here we are pre-race.

Next, it was off to the brewery tour, which was packed. Like, twice as big as usual. But mmmmm CBC beer is yummy, ‘specially when it’s free. Del and I kept looking at their tanks and all and talking about safety regs and the like. We are silly girls, yes we are.

After lunch at Mitch’s, a mini-tour of NCState, some pretty picture taking (see below!) and a drive through Raleigh proper, we did the best thing of all—we napped! We were tired—we’d been in seven cities in seven hours! (Morrisville, Chapel Hill, Durham, Cary, Apex, Holly Springs and Raleigh!)

And then had sushi, and then went out on the town. At Hibernian we ran into my co-worker Dmitry and his buddies. Once we’d moved to Bogart’s we also met a few members of the News 14 Carolina team. It was quite creepy to see the weatherman on tv the next day, let me tell you. And one of the guys, the birthday boy who I kept calling “28” kept calling me “glasses.” I met some photography peeps too. And some dudes with weird names—Champ and Boss—and then a very funny guy named Kenneth who Del and I could call Kenny ‘cause we’re white. Good times, good drinks, good music and fun dancing! My kinda night!!! Except for the fact that my legs were like, "carrie, what the hell? you take us walking for miles and miles and then you make us walk in heels?!?" I'm used to being able to wear heels as much as I want, but weird sections of my legs were not pleased with me at all. Still fun though. anyhoo.

here's del, me and marla

the russian and me

and dmitry's friend tom, another photo-aholic and funny face maker. I *might* have been trying to make a fish face. maybe. not sure. I do know for sure I was trying not to laugh!

And this? This was all on Saturday. And it’s why you should totally come visit me. :) It was a little weird though—I realized how much I know about where I am, and how to get places, and factoids and all. I think maybe, just maybe, I’m a teensy-weensy-whole-lot more of a North Carolinian than I let on. I’m sure as heck starting to sound like ‘em.

More about Sunday not now. Mostly ‘cause I’m tired, I leave to drive Del to Kinston in an hour, and I’m sick. My voice isn’t functioning properly—it’s dropped like four octaves (okay, maaaaybe more like .12) and it’s all scratchy and half-functional. Ugh.

friday, glorious friday!

I am mucho pleased that it is friday. Del arrives today, and Mattie (my mazda) and I will be taking a leisurely two hour drive to collect her. We will have a weekend of activities possibly including museums, beer and a little 5k walk for the unc shamrock'n'run. notice, we'll be walking. I don't run unless I'm being chased, there's an emergency or there's a ball involved.

kat and brooke have inspired me to join in on the corners of my home. and here's mine.


it's cluttered and full but I LOVE it. shelves make me happy. they're all along one wall of my room, and there's another small shelf where the ceiling angles down. I also have another kick-ass set of shelves in my kitchen. perhaps I'll share them later. the best part about this shelf is that it contains a lot of things that are important to me--books, pictures, paintings, my plethora of (covered in wrapping paper) text books, some of my paints, my outstanding freshman award and all sorts of memorabilia that's probably more important to me than I could explain to you. these are three of my favorite parts.

I cleaned my room last night, and while it was a harrowing task, I am pleased with the results. And with the music I got to listen to and with the phone company I had for part of it, too. :) My room upstairs is huge-ish, and though I love it that also means it gets dirty really really easy. Oh, and I found a picture of little little Carrie as a ballerina. How cute I was! And look how my mom had to shorten my little leotard. I think I'm three in that picture--we started ballet when I was two!


enjoy your weekend! pictures are SURE to be good--Del is one of the very most fun people I know, and she's a fellow nerd, and a kaydee lady, so we're bound to have a blast!

yay for the first friday in march!!!!

[daffodils on the] highway, i want to ride it all [day] long...

wouldn't the song be much happier that way? that's what I thought! I saw them on I-40. That's one of my favorite things about this area--they plant flowers along the highway. so cheery!

goodbye, february funk, helllllloooooo, nurse! I mean, um, March. :)

so, it's definitely doing the in like a lion, out like a lamb thing--maybe not where I am, but did you SEE the map on cnn.com? it's changed now, but it looked like the one below--yowzers. helllllooooo, tornadoes! it looks like baa-aa-aa-aa-aa-a-d news. please excuse the terrible joke. but only a little.

oh and, know how some people don't do windows? well, I've decided I don't do mornings. we don't work well, me and mornings. today, per usual I was late--yes, again--this time to the dentist. which is pretty annoying. also? their clock was TEN MINUTES ahead of mine, so instead of being three minutes late it was thirteen. icks, I tell you, icks.

I am excited about March because:
1. three of my favoritest people ever and a couple of my friends are march babies.
2. st patty's day--it's almost, almost as good as halloween.
3. green beer.
4. green green green everything. oh, how I love green. almost as much as pink. and purple. and yellow. and turquoise. and orange. and, uh, the spectrum. maybe I should just leave it at oh, how I love green, eh?
5. del's coming into town--tomorrow!!! (mattie and i are looking forward to our drive!)
6. it is not february!
7. oooh, I need a seven. hows abouts this--FLOWERS! i heart flowers. ooh, and I can start my little seedlings for growing this summer. oooooh!

[i am dancing a jig in my head I'm so excited about m-a-r-c-h! well, not a real jig, 'cause I don't know how, but in my head it involves loud shoes, arm movement and the occasional heel click]

mmm, also, yesterday I learned a good way to get a free beer. knock over a chair. not your chair, but the one next to you. make it real loud. have people clap--seriously. smile despite your embarrassment. and then? then the slightly-creepy guys a few seats down will buy you a beer. well, I think this hinges on you being a girl, but whatev.

happy march! it's going to be march-tastic, march-eriffic and march-tacular!

this makes me want to go four-leaf clover hunting. i do love it, y'know. i'll let you know if I have any luck finding them ;)

meet the newest member...

of the now we can round up to thirty club!*

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SJG.

and in his honor, here are some fun from-december pictures. yay for LA, the cool quiktrip and preparing for when we're old and chilling in our rockers.




this year he's encouraged me to do photography, talked to me at various random hours and times, suggested good books, made me thismuch more nerdy (due to my fresh knowledge of comics!), cut open my lip (all because of my kicking his ass on the wii), sent me some damn funny postcards, played the cup game and and and--helped me pick out a gee-tar. he rocks. if you're lucky, maybe you'll get to meet him some day, and if you're luckier, you prolly already know him. :D

happy happy birthday, baby.


*please allow 4-6 weeks for the delivery of your AARP card. it would get there sooner, but it's coming from your local office, and we're walking it to you, but we're old, so it might take a while.

let’s all raise a glass to the february finale.

cheers, skoal, l’chaim and salute! Or any other way you wanna say it. because in a few oh-so-short-but-still-of-usual-length hours, this loverly month will be O-V-E-R. thank goodness!

In an effort to be positive, I thought about writing 28 reasons that february isn’t that bad, but I decided it would require too much thinking. And then I thought about writing 28 reasons I hate february in order to get that dislike out—a catharsis, if you will—and decided it would be too depressing.

Instead? Some little factoids…

~if you dream of february it signifies ongoing ill health and gloom.
~february has Valentine’s Day. Thank you oh-so-much, Hallmark.
~its name comes from the Latin word for purification.
~it's spelled funny and its pronunciation is awkward and confusing at best.
~it is national lactose intolerance awareness month.
~february has disaster day (the 5^th), lame duck day (the 6^th) and toothache day (the 9^th).
~even the songs about February aren't chipper.
~and I hate it.

I use the word hate very carefully and about as much as I use the word “never.” I don’t like it, (you could say I hate the word hate, really…) but sometimes it’s appropriate. And this is one of those times. Usually it isn’t worth it to waste emotion on an inanimate object (such as a month) but this month is an exception. Because it is suck-tastic. Clearly, a month with holidays like that is bad news.

And I am super-dee-duper pleased that march begins tomorrow. And that february, while the most miserable month, is also the shortest. I am wearing cheery pink today in recognition of how freaking glad I am that the month-o-doom is coming to an end.

so here’s to us, for making it through february. cheers! high-fives all around! and dance a little jig in honor of the end of crap-ola month! yippee!

i like this.

saw it on a car on my way to the dermatologist. it made me nod my head. well, either that did or the death cab. one or the other. either way, I like it.

what do okies and texans have in common?

Well, apparently they often say what I say: “one, two, three, four, I declare a pinochle war.” You might’ve heard it’s a thumb war. And as far as I’m concerned, you’re mistaken. :)

I very much enjoyed Texas. It made me miss Oklahoma, actually. The people there are so freaking nice. And helpful. And although people in North Carolina are nice, the Okies and Texans put ‘em to shame.

I got to have Sonic, do tons of shopping (hello, Ross Dress for Less, this is Carrie calling. She hearts you.), consult answer-me-jesus (apparently I should be a patent lawyer, but when I asked if I'd go to hell for being a lawyer He said "have a nice afterlife" so I'm not sure how to take that...), have Scotty P’s, Blue Mesa (tex-mex at its finest, or texican, as Jessica called it), go to Hobby Lobby, eat sushi (twice!), go to outlet malls, take part in a dust storm and have some good ol’ Texas bbq ribs. (I don’t even like ribs, really, but these were awesome!)

And I saw A LOT of people—Renee and Jessica, of course. And Leanne. And Misha Baker. And Mark Turner. And my family (Candi, Randy, Jan, Chris and his girlfriend Brandy and her son Kaiden). And weirdest of all? Who did I run into in the Allen outlet mall JCrew? Saul Albom. It was like a mini-TU reunion this weekend. Weirdness.

I also came home with…counting here…three pairs of shoes, a jacket, sunglasses, a scarf, a purse, a necklace, five shirts, two pairs of socks, a dress, a skirt, two tank tops, five shirts, a pair of boxers (for sleeping in), a suit (with two different tops—jacket and another thing), a big bottle of shampoo and conditioner, a ball cap and two bottles of wine. Some of this I bought, others were gifts or hand-me-downs or things I left in Tulsa. But holy frigging moly was my luggage stuffed!

I have lots of pictures (duh!) but here’s a few for starters. My family and then the one Mark took of me, Misha, Jess and Renee (that's one of my cute new tops!). And me with the Bluebell (and the cute braids courtesy of Jessica!) Ooh, and that fountain is one of my fave pics from the trip.

And then there’s the picture of me driving a convertible for the first time ever—it’s my Aunt’s cute little Mercedes. I was so afraid I’d wreck it, but after driving I totally want a convertible. Well, I mean when I get my karmann ghia, which some day I will, I want it to be a convertible!

Happy Tuesday, peeps.

the stars at night are big and bright

[clap clap clap clap]

deep in the heart of texas!

which, uh, I'm not in--'cause Dallas sooooo isn't deep in the heart of texas. but it's a start.

and it's full of outlet malls, texican food and wonderful people that I love very much. lucky me.

:)

happy frienday folks--weird, 'cause I meant to say happy friday, but I typed happy frienday, and that's really a whole lot more accurate. okay, lunch and shopping are calling my name, ttfn.

sink or swim?

So, the more I read about them, the more credence I give to the meaning of dreams. Maybe this isn’t something done by all of the hoi polloi, but it’s done by me, and that’s what matters.

And my dream last night kind of makes me laugh. Because here I was, thinking I was over-thinking, when in fact, perhaps I'm not. odd, since I'm a chronic over-thinker.

~~~~

I was at an outdoor pool, or maybe one in a very very big room. There were bleachers on my right, and in the distance I could see a house, which I assumed was a frat house. And somehow, I ended up feeling like I had to do what I was told. There was a guy there, about my age, standing on the side at the other end of the pool.

He told me my task: to dive into the pool, swim to the other side, spin myself around(like a human screwdriver) and burrow through the half of a tomato on the other end. This tomato, by the way? Yeah, bigger than a bean bag chair.

I protested—I was worried I wouldn’t be able to spin fast enough to get through, and even if I could, what about the skin? I mean, who wants to die underwater, inside of a half of a giant tomato, near a frat house? that’s what I thought…

Well, he told me to do it anyway. And I protested—and he said “fine, then, it’s your choice,” threw a nickel in the air and told me to call it—“heads!” I said. And it landed tails. Which I understood meant that I’d have to do this, and that there’d be another task as well.

I calmed myself down, got poised and ready, and dove into the water.

~~~~

And then I woke up.

I guess I’m trying to get to the root of things—what I want, my problems, my thoughts. I’m trying to break through, to reach a place of happiness and harmony instead of anxiousness and unrest and maybe even discomfort/embarrassment. But I’m letting my rational, aggressive, competitive side call the shots—and taking things too casually, too lightly.

huh, how weird. I’m gonna have to mull over this some more—perhaps it isn’t about what I think it’s about. [which, by the way, just made me think of the princess bride and vizzini:inconceivable! inigo montoya: you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.--oh, how I love the princess bride. ]

anyway, check out dreammoods.com—you never know what you might find out about yourself.

It was [seven] years ago today, sgt. pepper taught the band to play…

~lennon and mccartney

Today is a big part of the reason why I don’t like February. Sometimes I wish that it would pass without me noticing, but it never ever does. Thank goodness a lot of it is only a fuzzy recollection. So I try to remember the good things about my dad, and that helps. But it makes my heart heavy, and my eyes water a little bit anyway.

so, onto happier topics. and listage. because I don't want to spend the day all mopey. :D

1. I am PUMPED about going to Dallas tomorrow. PUMPED, I tell you.
2. I had a guitar lesson yesterday. I thought I’d gotten over a lot of my perfectionist-ic tendencies, but alas, I have not. But now I have some finger exercises, and it hurts to type with my left pointer—but I kind of think it’s a good hurt.
3. The clouds were AWESOME this morning. It was sunny, but the clouds were grayish and kinda fluffy. It made me think of Oklahoma.
4. I am doing an experiment. It involves a guy who is a real, genuine player. And I am getting a lot of amusement out of it. Don’t worry, I’m not being mean or anything, just gauging responses.
5. My new apartmentie Michelle and I are getting along swimmingly. Last night we had salmon, couscous and mixed veggies for dinner. Mmmmmm.
6. Yesterday I got commissioned work as a photographer. A guy I kinda sorta know from my softball team saw my photos after he found me on myspace, and has asked me to photograph the 1965 mustang that his family owns. It’s his dad’s bday in April, and they may be selling the car soon, so he wants me to capture it for them. This is EXCITING! And I’m trying to decide if it qualifies for completing resolution #4 or not.
7. Tonight is LOST!!!

Also, I have decided to give up procrastination for Lent. I mean, it’s not that I’m going to be 100% efficient 100% of the time, BUT. I am going to be a non-procrastinator. Starting today. First step: register for the GRE. I just have to decide if I’d rather take it on a Friday or a Monday. Hmm hmm. Then, I’m going to place a follow-up phone call to find out about the JD/MS program. And then, who knows??? Maybe being a non-procrastinator will suit me! And I figure I'm going to be a lot more in tune with whatever I should be doing if I get moving on it!

oh, wednesday, why can’t you be over already? why, why, why? Tomorrow will be a much better day, I just know it.

does this tuesday make me look fat?

I learned something on sunday: fat tuesday is also shrove tuesday AND pancake day. I like it that they're having a pancake dinner at my church, which is tres fun, even if I don't get to go 'cause I have guitar lessons.

I'm not certain what I'm giving up for lent. I briefly considered blogging, and then decided that was dumb. :) I thought about giving up Gilmore Girls (because I'm addicted) and I may do that, but I'm thinking about giving up procrastinating, maybe. I'm very good at that. procrastinating, that is, not giving up things.

I do think I'll never come up with a better thing to give up for Lent than I did my sophomore year of college (at least I think it was then. I'm pretty sure it wasn't my freshman year. I think that year I gave up calculus.). For that forty days I decided to give up worrying. The amount of time I freed up by not worrying was INCREDIBLE. When people asked and I told them they gave me some pretty crazy looks when I said, "yeah, I'm giving up worrying for Lent." But seriously? Couldn't've asked for a better thing to do.

moving on.

so, my guitar playing? well, I now know three-point-five-ish chords. but I'm really annoyed. at my ring finger. "Ring Man" in the thumbkin song. That fourth one. (that's three in guitar-land) The one with that vein or whatever that goes to the heart. So, I'm having trouble with it--I can't press the strings right, and instead of changing the pitch I just end up muting the string. Oddly enough, my ring fingers have been a problem for every instrument I've played--the piano, the flute and now the guitar. I couldn't press the keys "pretty enough" in piano, I had to put the hole stops back in my open-hole-flute and now I cannot press the strings right. Apparently it's shaped funny, moves funny and kinda weak. hmmm....

I'm sure someone could make a huge metaphor about my problems with my ring finger, but I'm not gonna, coz that's not how I roll. but anyhoo.

happy fat tuesday, kiddos.

oooh, and. I am a skosh concerned about the admission stuff for the JD/MS program I'm interested in, but I'm thinking it might work out after all. I read the fine print. :)

one way or another [he's] gonna get ya', get ya', get ya', get ya'

~blondie

hey, what's up with the anon-comment jerk? anyone else experiencing this? I got a skosh of harshness on my photog blog, and then I saw that kat had somebody be a meanie, too. craptasticness, methinks. someone has TOO MUCH FREE TIME and prolly no friends, but I'm just guessing here.

also? on a wholly unrelated topic, I'm quite proud of myself. I had to have blood taken at the doctor's office today and I did not faint! That's two times in a row!

perhaps I should avoid commenting on how sad it is that part of my exciting things in life have to do with not fainting when blood is drawn from my arms...oops, now I've gone and done it.

well my heart knows me better than i know myself so i'm gonna let it do all the talking.

(woo-hoo,woo-hoo)
~ kt tunstall

I’m going to have to play this song each time a guy is yucky. Because, well, it’s a good reminder.

And, um, would it be annoying for me to keep up this whole quoting songs or people as titles forever? ‘cause I think for the most part I’m gonna. Moving on…

So, today I’ve already poked myself once in each eye—once with my mascara wand (which HURTS—I may have to rethink mascara being my fave kind of makeup, you can do FAR less damage with a blush brush!) and once with my cute pink wreath when I was hurriedly going back inside to fetch my coffee I’d mistakenly left inside my house. It was a bit painful, as I’m sure you can see. :D

Now, I find this particularly funny since I’ve been wearing makeup, mascara specifically, since, oh, my freshman year of high school? (I actually remember ‘cause Eddie Fairchild was like, “hey, you look different, what’s different?” And I was too embarrassed to admit it!) and also I’ve been walking up to my door with a wreath on it for, like, ever (okay, maybe a year and change?) and I’ve never before managed to poke any part of myself with it, much less my EYEBALL. What’s that about?

Also, my dreams are freaking me out. Two nights in a row I dreamt about being dismembered and paralyzed. Which, in and of itself, is damn creepy. And then I looked it up, and I don’t like what it says. Often times when I look up dreams I’m like “oh, okay…I get it.” But not this time. What is falling apart? If anything, I thought I was getting it all together…

Eh, whatev.

Happy Tuesday people—well, at least, it’s already Tuesday for me!!!