dreams are necessary to life.-anais nin

a dream...and you (Ariel) and you(Audrey)...were there. (Everyone laughs) But you couldn't have been, could you?

ah, the wizard of oz. mmm mmm good.

so my dream last night? so so strange.

we were in a helicopter. ariel was driving, and she was on the right side. we were (for some reason) driving along a road, trying to get to somewhere to take off, I guess. the road suddenly curved to the right, and we couldn't see it from ahead, and we went off the road and into the water. we fell and fell, and we fought to stay awake until we slowed down so we could get out. and then I woke up.

it was so scary and surreal.
and revealing.
I looked up helicopter, falling, drowning, driving. and, uh, yeah. freaky accurate.

whoa.

and I kind of want to tell you about my date last night, but I kinda don't. I had a very very excellent time. I guess that's all I'll say for now, other than something that I thought was funny. He's a bit older than me (five years older that carrie> his age> ten years older that carrie). And I made some joking comment about him being older, and he said something like I'll rob the cradle if you'll rock my chair. It made me laugh. And he taught me a new word. vicissitude.

thank the good Lord it's friday. I need some serious sleep. but first? mean girls, chicken parm (so excited!!!) and hearing a sure-to-be-rather-unfortunate tale of a jerk of a guy taking advantage of a girl, but hearing it over beer will make it so much better... :)

psycho killer qu’est que c’est

(bah da da dah, da da dah da da)

I have that stuck in my head. Because, well, I'm being careful, that's why. Gotta make sure semi-strangers aren't psycho killers, y'know?

G-Love was AWESOME last night. Had a really good time. Took the smallest purse in the universe (as far as I'm concerned) and it was quite refreshing! it's this cute little wristlet thing from wet seal that's black and white polka dotted. tres cute.

anyhoo. It was really cool to see everyone rock out when he played Baby's Got Sauce. Good good stuff. Except for the guy who pushed in front of me on the balcony, and then when he wanted to go get another beer basically grabbed my ass while pushing me out of the way. Crazy stuff.

a lot of the people we went with were friends of Coach Dreamy, and we briefly discussed the disaster that was the date. his friends were all like, "yeah, the girls always like him, but he's just so not suave." I'm glad I broke the ice about that. And in the spring I think I'm going to play kickball!!!

so, things I learned last night.
1. it is possible to get a hurty stomach simply from inhaling second-hand smoke.
2. i succumb to peer pressure sometimes. (I had a cigarette! ew ew ew!)
3. drunk people are handsy.
4. if you are going to a concert, expect to see a lot of people who, along with the rest of their clothes, have left their dignity in the car. friends don't let friends wear outfits like that.
5. betsy is brilliant. I should go with her to places at all times. when, early in the evening, she went to the restroom, she noticed that the toilet paper supply was quite low. so she snagged some squares, stuffed them in her purse and doled them out to the girls in our group as needed. i, for one, was thankful.

I also went to choir, and it was GREAT! I was super nervous, 'cause of my voice getting a little lower, and my long time of not singing, and how super-dee-duper awesome being a part of the Trinity choir with Janet leading (and sitting next to renee, and having jacob/philip/annette/debby/bob/everyone to sing with!) was. But it went really well. I did a lot better at sight-reading than I had anticipated, and I don't think I'll have trouble coming up to speed on the songs. It makes me miss having a piano though. Maybe I'll buy a keyboard. hmm. It was also neat 'cause one of the ladies, (Martha?) asked me if I'd helped the girl scouts two weeks ago--apparently her daughter is in that troop! Cool, huh?

my allergies strike back

('xcuse the nerdy title)

So, let me get this straight: amongst various enviromental factors, soaps, perfumes and other substances and flora (and thankfully no fauca), including hickory and sycamore trees, I am allergic to wool. And cashmere. And angora. And polyester. And lots of other factors. And my allergy, by itself, is harming the environment. Huh.

Like, oh, let's say, 90% of my wardrobe is all cotton, maybe with a smidge of spandex or nylon. Maybe. I have some dresses that aren’t cotton, and a few wool sweaters, but even wearing those is a process, as my skin can’t actually touch the non-cotton fabric, or I itch. At least it’s mild. But yeesh.

oooh--and something exciting….see this pretty website here? I’m going to get business cards!!! yaaaaaay, brooke! [insert herky here?] I am super-dee-duper excited. Then I will give them away at my leisure (instead of writing everything on the back of my work business cards) and maybe, just maybe, I’ll be famous some day! ;) I am tres thrilled at this. And uber gleeful. And yay!

Eh. Time for plating o’ the tube-age. Yick. (why did I have to like bubbles so much? why, WHY???)

Oh, and while investigating my phone issues with the help of the cute guys at the cingular store, I found out about this—the cocktail neckware collection. Very cool. They show the molecular patterns of alcoholic beverages as seen under the microscope. The guy, Beniamino, had one called Amaretto Sour. Quite neato, really. and omg I'm a terrible terrible nerd. I'm thrilled by how something looks under a microscope! I feel more nerdy every day!

so now I'll go be one officially...and enter the lab-coat-wearing world of lab 154.

kisses and too-da-loos.

tonight: the g-love with the sauce of specialness. and jackie will be (successfully) baking a pie!!! updates tomorrow, I'm sure.

you know things are uneventful when...

you blog about your tape dispenser.

see him? well, he's like mine, but mine is opaque not translucent, and he's green. like lime green. and though his style name is "elvis," as coined by koziol, I call him tapey. this would be much more amusing if you've ever seen one of my cubes or offices. it's entirely appropriate for me to have a tape dispenser like this. :)

I am feeling like a crazy crazy traveller right now. I stay in town this weekend, go to Portland the next, LA the weekend after that, am home for two weeks and then go to Tulsa. And then in January or February I want to go to Dallas, and go to Alaska in the spring or summer, and I'll hopefully be going to Tulsa (and hopefully Albuquerque or Santa Fe?) in May, along with Tulsa again in June for Jessica's wedding. Plus, Mary Alise and I (and Ariel, and Betsy, and whoever else) are already discussing our next potential trip. Too much fun!!! I think I need a better suitcase. My samsonite is falling apart and my skyway luggage one has eight years of wear and tear--meaning it barely rolls properly now. Hmm.

anyhoo. this isn't interesting, huh? yeah. but my other options are talking about a) my mse class, b) grad school, c) guys or d) work. maybe on thursday I'll have something fun to share, since I'm going to see G-Love at the Lincoln Theatre!

math is a four-letter word.

ah, toothpaste for dinner makes me happy.

i am so sad.

I just got excited about a balance.  Like, you know how some people get excited when they find, say, a twenty in their pocket, or they discover that their project deadline has been delayed a week?  Yeah, well I just did that when I found out we have a balance in our lab.  How sad am I?

no, wait, where was that lion?!?

so, richmond? fun place.

well, we drove to richmond in the am, went through a police barricade to get to our hotel, checked in and headed for short pump. after some yummy sushi we hit the mall--we went shopping at h&m and urban outfitters and nordstroms, where we bought the cutest shoes! they're these retro looking bcbgirls shoes--mine in multi rust and mary alise's in grey and brown. they look like an old couch or sweater. so fun! and then there was the incredible home furnishings offered by west elm and crate and barrel. yowza!

I couldn't resist this stocking--it's the one on the right, and it looks more pink in person. Pink and Shiny? totally Carrie. ;)

I think I really like this couch. A little retro and a lot of fun...I'm not 100% on it yet, but it was comfy. And I'm so glad we went and sat on everything!!! I don't know about either of these colors, but I have more options too. i think I'm going to ask for samples.

so, then we got a manicure, had our hair washed and styled, and went to the macy's makeup counters to get our make-up done. she put an awful lot on, but it looked quite good! and it was nice to have hair with volume! at the hotel we changed and sucked down the champagne before heading to the tobacco company. we gave up waiting in line to go downstairs, and headed in.

we met some skeezy old guys, and I walked up and introduced myself to this very attractive guy who was there with his friends. (thanks mary alise for making me!) we had fun talking...and shooting kamikazes that were the size of a juice glass--yikes! a few too many drinks later we wandered around, heels making us almost fall over on the cobblestone. buuuuttt...we met some men in uniform! :)

there were lots and lots of marines out there--guess they'd had a ball or something.

and then the cop who apparently was a marine first. they talked about it a little. this cop looks frightened! or like a deer in headlights.

after an excursion to the hospitality suite of some guys whose company had brought them there from washington state, we finally went to bed. at some time after 4am. needless to say the ride home was a miserable one. but, we got breakfast in our room, and sat in bed recounting the night. We'd forgotten about most of the pictures, and when I pulled up the more recent one-with the lion, we could not remember for the life of us where it was! We know it's on Cary Street inbetween the Tobacco Company and Sine, but that's all she wrote...

our breakfast. yum! despite the headache. also, I believe that the amount of cologne worn by the skeezy old men in that bar made my nose very angry. :(

I'm glad to be home, not in the car and spending time with my kitties, but I can't wait for our next trip!

so, it might not be completely accurate...

but it was a nice thing to hear.

tonight at dinner someone said---ooh! I know! I figured out who you remind me of, it's been driving me crazy all night.

and the person? lauren ambrose in six feet under: claire.


it took talking about photography and art to really make him say that, but apparently even my mannerisms make him think of her. He said that I have the same kind of edgy confidence--I think I like that. :)

and? weird. I keep getting compared to people with red hair (claire danes as angela chase, julianne moore, lauren ambrose...). huh. I mean, I get my fair share of blondes and brunettes too (calista flockheart, ellen pompeo) but still. it's the red-headed ones that always are the most flattering.

anyhoo. I should be in bed in prep for my fun tomorrow!!!

spiderman3

check out the trailer here!

meeting every day with the rising sun looking up it's looking like my losing streak is done

My losing streak is done

I said my losing streak is done
Did you hear me
I said my losing streak is done

well. have you heard of the eels? good stuff. good good stuff. and that's what I've decided. my losing streak is done. and I'm really happy about that. watch out world, here comes Carrie. ;)

so, anyhoo. my chair came in yesterday, and it's beautissimos. It isn't blue, and it isn't green. It's more of a pale blue/sea green color. love-lee. I am so buying another one. Or the ottoman. Is it comfy? yes. Is it incredibly comfy? no. It's a tinge high off the ground. However, it is big and roomy and perfect for sitting indian style/tailor fashion/criss-cross applesauce. Which is perfect for TV watching and studying. Now, only to decide. A second chair or the ottoman? I'm kind of leaning towards the chair. Chairs work well in pairs.

and tomorrow I embark on the journey of a lifetime. or, um, a trip to richmond. i. am. stoked. yippee!


I saw this on my way to my car today and had to take some pictures. I LOVE THE FALL!

"set phasers to stun and tell him you're not interested."

and that's why I love Sterling Gates.

hugs and kisses, BFF. thanks for making me laugh. often and much. I hope you and Computron/BlackBook/Dr. MacEvil live a long and happy, nerd-free life together.

sixtieth

my grandparents don't read this--heck, my granny even REFUSES to use or own a computer--but I'm really amazed by them today. because it is their sixtieth wedding anniversary. their diamond anniversary. one of those few years where the "traditional" and "modern" gifts match.

sixty years is a long, long time. sixty years with three children, six grandchildren, two great grandchildren (so far!), ten or more family weddings (eight where my grandfather walked the bride down the aisle), many houses, at least four cities, a couple of churches, many bible studies, multiple surgeries and joint replacements, four dogs that I know of, and they're still going strong.

some would say it's just for show. they're OLD now. and they often don't get along. but it's sweet too because I see that there are still parts of them that love each other very much.

so this is them, from when I visited in May.

and here's what my family and I sent them (adam, you too!). well, this or something like it.



and I've been thinking recently (and as a divorced woman I think I can say this. well, you could say it if you weren't too. but I feel like maybe I have a little bit more perspective on the matter) about marriage. and what's wrong with it today. and high profile couples who split, and that 50% divorce rate, and wow. it makes me really sad. People do grow apart, or aren't who they seem, and I get that. I really get that. But it makes me sad that it is what it is. I'd say it's the pressure to marry--but when hasn't that existed? And the smugmarrieds who say divorce is lame are right, but they're wrong at the same time. (and asses for judging, but moving on...) I'm really sincerely hoping that this divorce rate goes down. And that people are taught more about what really makes two human beings compatible, and how to fight fair and how not to cheat. I wish that people as a whole were more honest, had more integrity, and placed more value on love than money.

because I think the beatles were onto something...because at the end of the day, married or single or in-between, gay or straight or bi, happy or sad or lukewarm, smart or stupid or average, black or white or red, love is all you need.

they're going to think we're lesbians.

well, they are...I mean, maybe.

'tis hump day.
and last of fall LOST day.
and day carrie got back her last test. (booooo. but I passed! I want to know the class average, dangit.)

I'm also spending today uber annoyed at Cingular for my phone having not yet arrived. Stupid razr that stupid broke.

at least this weekend will be fun fun fun. couch shopping and h&m and maybe even ikea! mary alise and I kind of think they're gonna thing we're together though--because we booked the "rendevous for two" room with a bottle of champagne. There was a cheaper option, but for $10 we chose champagne over chocolate. get ready for a whirlwind of pictures, I bet!

so, uh, interesting news today. the democratic house. the by-one-seat-right-now senate. rumsfeld's resignation. spederline dissolving (and they're calling him FedEx-ha!). and word on the street is they bleeped the president 'cause he said something that's a no-no.

hmm.

I'm excited tho that we're maybe gonna have our very first madam speaker...

okay, nothing else interesting. things aren't exciting on the carrie-front. just busy... and excited that my chair should arrive at my apt tomorrow...anyhoo.

october 23rd.

huh.

so, Anna's (my twin sister's, if you didn't know) friend Cat commented on her myspace that Benson said that October 23rd was the day the Universe was created. How did I miss that?!? Anyhoo. But look. See the very first event in the list? Interesting. hmm.

raindrops. so many raindrops.

it feel like raindrops...falling from my eyes.

why do I have a david cassidy song in my head people? why?? WHY?!?

for two reasons:
a) it is rainy and cold outside and I wish I were still in bed, especially since I worked for nine and half hours yesterday and then watched Heroes (so good!) and went to bed.
b) I am allergic to something. What, I don't know. But I've had three people ask me "if I'm okay" because I look like I am crying. I've made tear spots on my new pink pillowcases. Because my dad-gum eyes are all weepy and runny from something in the golly-gee-whilikers air. tres annoying.

but this song won't go away. and neither will the cold and yucky rain. or the allergies. grr.

you won’t be single for long

vodka cream pasta.

That’s what the Jessica-dubbed-Coach-Dreamy made me for dinner on Saturday. It was pretty yummy, but maybe needs a little more oomph. Very good job though, especially for a guy who admitted that he’d never even purchased chicken broth before! We had salad and chicken and bread as well—LOTS of options about the way to put things together (chicken with sauce, pasta and chicken with sauce, dressing options, etc.) I could make this into a much funnier story, and tell you about the way he hid the cookbook, but I don't wanna be mean.

The date was okay, but I think everyone who I’ve told is right—him cooking me dinner on the first date was an awful lot of pressure. It’s hard to be just getting to know someone and spent four and a half hours talking to only them with no external stimuli. Also, he is not so keen on cats, and that could be a problem. I actually made a (very bad) joke about him being a scaredy cat. [insert groan here] I just couldn’t resist!!!

All in all? A little disappointing, but I would prolly go on another date with him if he asked, just because we had such a good time at the Halloween party. And maybe we can go play pool or darts or something—an activity. With beer. The guy is more fun if he's drinking. anyhoo...

Immediately after my date I called Sterling (who is worried about adrienne) and then Jessica and Mark. I talked to Mark through two glasses of wine and until 2am. :) Anyhoo, while discussing how to proceed, Jess said something really funny: maybe he was just nervous, or maybe he needs to be trained. Except, this isn't "flip this house" and you're not "bob vila." ha!

Also, I’m curious…so, I’ve noticed that some guys here open the doors for girls, and some guys don’t. Of course it could just be nervousness if it’s a date sitch—making them open or not open. But I even notice it at work—the Asian men here actually are so genteel that they remove boxes from my hands and carry things for me if they see me straining even the slightest bit. (sidenote: sometimes I resent people calling things “men’s work,” but if it means I don’t have to lift heavy objects I’m all about it!) Are female engineers so intimidating that they actually cause guys to be afraid of opening their door? Hmm.

Right now I am still at work. It’s approaching 7pm. This lab moving stuff is RIDICULOUS. Eh, at least I’ll be able to leave earlier on Friday…but I soooo cannot believe It’s. Only. Monday.

Ooh, and I bought that chair I showed y’all. Very cheap and very cute! Let’s hope when it arrives it’s also comfy. But for the price and the cuteness and the practicality, I couldn’t pass it up! And if it’s not supercomfy that’s okay, I’ll be studying in it or watching TV anyhow, since it will be in my room.

And I luuuuurrrrve the set of chopsticks I bought for $4 at Ross Dress for Less—ten pairs and each pair is a different color! What am I going to do with these you ask? Have a good excuse to eat more sushi, that’s what! And they’re pretty! I’ll find them online or add a picture later—too cute! And shopping at Ross/TJ Maxx/Marshall’s is always so fun ‘cause it’s so inexpensive! Yay.

Eh. Time for more rinsing.

Ooh, and there are new photos on my photo blog—check ‘em out!

you are special.

one of my favorite people in the world gave me this book for my birthday five years ago. and I love it.
last night, after moving my bookcases and books upstairs, while re-arranging my books, I found it again. and so after brushing my teeth and putting on my face medicine and giving gobi his heart meds I cuddled into my newly-outfitted bed and read it.

and as usual, it made me happy cry. it is wonderful, and I love it, and I think every one of you needs to read it, or read it to your children some day. it's simple but profound. and I hope to be more like the Wemmick Lucia, and less like the other Wemmicks.

I am so glad she gave me this. :)

i wanna hold your hand...

that’s what Gobi says. The past few nights, when he’s not trying to sloooooly inch his way onto my pillow, he reaches out one of his front paws and puts it on my finger--kinda like how he's sitting in the bottom picture. Sometimes he even puts out his claws and wraps them around my finger like he's actually holding it!

And, this morning he laid on my tummy, which he never ever ever does. AND he held my finger. It's so cute! He likes to be close to me, but prefers to not snuggle, generally, unless it’s with my head, so this was a rare treat. He usually just snuggles with Hazel.

aw.

And Hazel? She’s now following me EVERYWHERE. It’s like I have a shadow that climbs onto every surface I’d prefer she not.

Ooh, and other fun things.

~my new bedding came in (duvet and pillowcases) as did my pink sheets. So cute! Used ‘em last night.
~I have a date tomorrow night with the hot guy who Jessica has dubbed “Coach Dreamy”. :) He's either taking me to dinner or cooking me dinner. Not sure which still--he called last night but I returned his call too late.
~with some help I moved a bunch of furniture upstairs. my new room pleases me greatly.
~I have some people who are interested in renting the room downstairs—two different guys and a girl—girl gets first priority!
~I think I’ll also have a date with the other guy, the one who is geeky cute. We just haven’t had our schedules work out—but this one may only get one date, ‘cause he’s terribly indecisive. And if I’m calling someone too indecisive, you know it must be bad.
~I think I want to buy this chair for my bedroom. Anyone ever bought furniture from overstock? The sheets I have from there are nice.

~it is Friday!!!
~tonight I am cleaning, vegging out and watching Grey’s Anatomy from last night. Seriously. And I love having a dvr. Love it.

come on, I'll let you borrow my four leaf clover, come on, take it with you you can pass it on...

~badly drawn boy.

I have found so many of these that I forget where I put 'em. they're usually in my copy of the secret garden, but I think that might still be in Tulsa. anyhoo.

Last night I was giving my room and closet a thorough cleaning--going through drawers and putting up clothes that were still in laundry baskets, throwing away things, etc. (PS, anybody want some cute size 1 or 2 clothes? I cannot BELIEVE I could wear those in college and after I moved here. Did I not eat?!? Or was I just uncomfy all the time because my pants were too tight and I was in size denial? hmm...) So back to the story.

I look in the top drawer of my dresser and I find a little jewelry box--with these guys in 'em.

I'd pressed them in a book, but I'd never gotten around to taping them up (so they'll stay nice). I find SO MANY four-leaf clovers--and notice that one of 'em has five! I once found one with seven leaves--it was pretty cool, especially since you could see that it was really a four-leaf clover and a three-leaf clover that had conjoined stalks. Very neat.

But kind of weird because I'm not even sure that I really believe in luck. I believe more in fortune (see def 2) than I do luck. Maybe because I've found a bazillion of these little guys, and yet I don't know that I'm "lucky." "Fortunate," perhaps, but not lucky. Or maybe I just shouldn't believe in luck as it pertains to four-leaf clovers. hmm, hmm. After all, my eyeballs just recognize an abnormality in the pattern of the clover patch, right? I mean, sometimes I'll just walk by, they'll catch my eye, and I'll have found one.

anyhoo. [again]

you should ask sterling about the story (or was it a dream?) that he had about my finding a four-leaf clover and healing a snake bite with it or something like that. ah, being fourteen. ha!

ri-damn-diculous

so, yesterday I posted an apartment-mate ad on my work site, and today I finalized the one for craig's list. and you know what's crazy?

Fair Housing Laws.

Now, I know why these things exist. I totally understand that discrimination could be an issue and everyone has equal rights...but what's this crap about someone being able to SUE me for saying that I'd prefer to rent the room to someone with no kids, or who is in school, or who is young, or who is a female? huh?

what's the problem with this? and am I breaking the law by telling these people "no" if they call and ask about it? grr.

double grr even.

this is ridiculous in the same way that "do not iron clothes on body" labels are ridiculous.

ps--ooh, but wait. I just read that since we'll have shared space I am allowed to say "female." yee-haw.